It was, as expected, a rainy, dreary Monday today. The sun didn't come out once and the skies threatened drizzle all day. It didn't drizzle much but it was enough to make it a soggy day, nonetheless.
Still, as Mondays always do, it passed. Work was pretty uneventful which is not a bad thing at all other than the fact that I continue to experience a little ennui and tell Time Buddy rather more than it really wants to know.
The funny thing is that I think, a few months ago, I would have been in a different place, mentally. I probably would be complaining that, once again, I got bumped off a project I really wanted to be a part of in favour of my coworker being put on the project instead. This now means that since I joined my company, I've now been a part of...zero project teams. Not a one. The ones I've been on, I've been bumped off and I don't really know why. Well, I do- it's office politics.
In addition, my boss continues to ignore me and I'm working on the same thing day after day. It's nothing I have complained about in other blogs.
Yet, the interesting thing is that even though it bothers me while I'm at work, for the most part, the minute I leave the office, it fades from my mind and I don't even care.
I've been moving towards that place for a while. I think it's the puppies that pushed me over the edge, though. I was resistant about getting a dog because of the responsibility. I didn't want to be tied down; I wanted to be able to do what I wanted, when I wanted.
Then, somehow, thanks to my friend Ms. P, I started really thinking about getting a dog. So, I ended up with Rory and Sookie. Even though I do find that I have far less freedom, the interesting fact is that I don't care. I think, perhaps, I know, just a little, what it's like to be a parent. It's not nearly as bad. After all, if a parent put their child in a crate for four-hour time periods and let him/her out at lunch for just a little while, they'd probably get in serious trouble. I, however, can crate the puppies with no guilt because they really don't seem to mind and all of the books say it's a ok.
But still, I find myself missing my puppies whenever I leave them for any length of time. Even when I've had a miserable day in the office, I come home and their silly, adorable little faces stare up at me, not knowing or caring about where I've been, just that I'm home. I love that when I let them out of their crate and Sookie has done her business, she wants to come up on my lap and lick me and give me 'kisses' and sit with me. Then, Rory will try to join in and they'll start to bicker. It's a nice routine, even if it doesn't sound like it.
I'm no longer the footloose and fancy-free Monkeypants who can hop a plane to L.A. to visit friends when she has the time and resources, I don't mind. It's peculiar how natural it feels to think of the puppies before I plan anything. My routine has changed. We go to bed early and get up early. Even though I've never been a late sleeper, my earlier weekend hours mean that I can get out and about before places get crowded and then come home to spend the rest of the time with the puppies.
Of course, just like with kids, the puppies can be trying. Rory has figured out how to push open doors that don't latch right. One of them is my bedroom. If I turn my back for any length of time, Rory has led Sookie into the room and they've found my shoes. My new Crocs have a little imprint of Rory's teeth in them already. They also like the laundry basket and take pleasure in scattering my clothes across the room.
Tonight, I took a shower, leaving the door ajar to let them know I was in there. They tend to get upset if they think I've left them. I left my underwear, theoretically, out of reach and yet when I got out the shower, there was no underwear. It was in the living room.
Rory, obviously the troublemaker of the pair, has also figure out how to jump up onto the sofa. Sookie still can't do it. This means that even when I try to keep them down, Rory will take a flying leap and suddenly be right there. This leads to Sookie looking as though she's been spanked, a sorrowful pair of eyes staring up at me, hurt that I let Rory up and not her. So I lift Sookie up and then, Rory gets upset now Sookie is violating her space. Bickering ensues that ends up with wrestling and lots of groaning and moaning at one another.
Sookie is very good at looking sorrowful. She has a way of making me feel guilty even though I haven't, to my knowledge, done anything wrong. That's a dangerous gift she has. Rory, on the other hand, is quite vocal when I've done something wrong- barking and groaning at me so I know I've erred.
Even with all of the 'drama of puppies', I feel...happy. It's nice to have company, nice to have two little personalities who constantly keep me busy. Even though I'm having to adjust my habits and routines to fit theirs, it doesn't matter nearly as much as I thought I would. I've had a couple of rejections from agents/publishers, etc. since I've had them and even though it still stings a little, it doesn't leave me with the gloomy feeling of failure with which it used to leave me.
Of course, every now and again I do, just a little, miss being able to go in here, to my 'office' and blog without interruption. For example, Rory just came and sweetly tried to jump up so I put her on my lap. Then Sookie came in and gave me her reproachful, "hey, what about me?" look.
Now Rory is trying to get into my bedroom, inevitably to hunt down some laundry or shoes.
There's never a dull moment with puppies.
Happy Tuesday!
Monday, April 26, 2010
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