I can't believe I've been blogging this long and I've managed to accumulate 500 of them. I remember when I was just dithering about whether to start a blog at all. I finally stopped dithering and started blogging. Here I am, 500 blogs later. My very first blog was written on October 14, 2008. That's two days shy of exactly two years ago.
It's been a fun experience, blogging. If you haven't noticed, my blog wavers from being an outlet for issues in my personal life- most notably my miserable job- to being a commentary on the randomness of life. Since I've had the puppies, it's also been a narrative on the trials and tribulations of being a pet parent.
I find it fitting that exactly 500 blogs later and who knows how many whines, revelations and snarky comments about my job, I'm leaving the job in three days. I finally grew tired of my own bitterness and frustration and decided to do something about it.
I've noticed that 'doing things' is a pattern in my life. It's a good pattern. While I tend to be self-deprecating and lack a fair amount of esteem on most days, I do think one of my fundamental good points is that I'm a 'do-er'. I might be a slight procrastinator on the doing but I do eventually...do it.
I've noticed that 'doing things' is a pattern in my life. It's a good pattern. While I tend to be self-deprecating and lack a fair amount of esteem on most days, I do think one of my fundamental good points is that I'm a 'do-er'. I might be a slight procrastinator on the doing but I do eventually...do it.
I look back in my life and I realize that, for the most part, I've always been in charge of it. I've always managed to do what I want, in some way or another. I decide I want to blog...I start a blog. Then I keep blogging and don't shut up so that eventually, I'm reaching my 500th blogday (that's what Captain Monkeypants is calling momentous days in blogging. Blogdays. Sort of like birthdays but not really).
I got bored of living in the Midwest. I wanted to be a screenwriter. I moved to L.A. I wrote screenplays. Then I decided I'd rather write novels but, nevertheless, I decided to do something and I did it. When I decided to write a novel, I did. Then I wrote 8 more. I'm writing number 10, as we speak. Well, not at this exact moment but I'm writing it at work due to the fact that my boss is still acting like I broke his professional heart and has cut me out of each and every meeting I really should attend in my attempts to make my departure smooth. Since he's now officially acting like I'm already gone, I've decided to also act like I've already gone. I'm still doing the work that gets assigned to me but when I have downtime, I'm enjoying pecking away on Emmy Goes to Hell. If he finds out and decides to let me go early, I shall skip down the hallway with joy. Seriously. If I didn't honour the fact I said I was giving two weeks' notice, I'd have left last Friday.
Anyway, after I wrote some of my novels and had been living in L.A. for almost 8 years, I realized that coming back to the Midwest to see my family were the happiest times in my life. It began to feel like I was leaving pieces of my heart/soul behind every time I got back on the plane to go home. I knew it was time to move back. So I did. I managed to snag a job at my current company who, at the time, were shielded by the finances of the university to which they used to belong, and moved back. Granted, my job has never fit me that well but it helped me move back and helped me find some friends here in southwestern Ohio.
Anyway, after I wrote some of my novels and had been living in L.A. for almost 8 years, I realized that coming back to the Midwest to see my family were the happiest times in my life. It began to feel like I was leaving pieces of my heart/soul behind every time I got back on the plane to go home. I knew it was time to move back. So I did. I managed to snag a job at my current company who, at the time, were shielded by the finances of the university to which they used to belong, and moved back. Granted, my job has never fit me that well but it helped me move back and helped me find some friends here in southwestern Ohio.
After I was settled, I then decided I wanted to buy a house. So...I bought a house. I wanted a dog...so I got two. My most recent 'do-ing' escapade was realizing I'd not only bored my blog readers to death with the frustration and annoyance I felt with my job but also, my family was starting to get that glassy eyed look every time I had a little whine and a moan about it. I also realized I was boring myself with my frustration. So...I got another job.
This isn't my attempts to pat myself on the back and say, 'look at me, I'm bloody brilliant!'. It's just an attempt for me to show myself that despite the fact that I haven't been able to snag that lucrative yet elusive publishing contract or even so much as get a magazine story published, I've done some things in my life that aren't too shabby. My dream is to be a successful writer. My reality is that I'm a writer who needs to do something else to make money. My dream is to find a man with whom I click completely and can share my life. My reality is I have two little puppies and the hope that he's out there...somewhere. My dream is to have a house near the ocean someday so I can smell the sea as I write. My reality is a little house in the suburbs and a pumpkin spice candle.
This isn't my attempts to pat myself on the back and say, 'look at me, I'm bloody brilliant!'. It's just an attempt for me to show myself that despite the fact that I haven't been able to snag that lucrative yet elusive publishing contract or even so much as get a magazine story published, I've done some things in my life that aren't too shabby. My dream is to be a successful writer. My reality is that I'm a writer who needs to do something else to make money. My dream is to find a man with whom I click completely and can share my life. My reality is I have two little puppies and the hope that he's out there...somewhere. My dream is to have a house near the ocean someday so I can smell the sea as I write. My reality is a little house in the suburbs and a pumpkin spice candle.
What it comes down to is that even if I have a mental picture of my perfect life, the reality of what I really have isn't so bad. I look back over my 500 blogs and I see the good as well as the wallowing, depressed badness. Like any human, I have my ups and downs. My choice here, what I chose to do is to publish them online.
When I look at what I have blogged about, it's eclectic. If you scroll down on this page, to the right, near the bottom, you'll see a word cloud. This includes everything from my Stephanie Meyer rants to blogging about deer and Dexter to ladybugs, avocados, Mario Batali and fire extinguishers. It was originally supposed to be about my writing and the trials and tribulations of being a writer. In a way, it is. It's the portrait of someone who is a writer but that's not all she is. It's also the portrait of someone who clearly has had a beef with her job but hopefully that'll change over the next 500 blogs.
I'm going to keep blogging. I hope you'll keep reading. It's nice to know that there are people out there, reading my random musings. To each one of you, I thank you for reading along. It's been a fun 500. Hopefully the next 500 will be more fun. My new motto...less whining....more writing.
Although I don't necessarily mean that literally. If you haven't noticed, I'm horribly prolific. I'm a babbler. Perhaps I should make my motto, less whining, more concise writing.
But that wouldn't really be me, would it?
Thanks so much for reading. Happy Wednesday!
1 comment:
Congratulations on your 500th blog days. What an accomplishment! I think you definitely should pat yourself in the back for this! I've really enjoyed reading your blog, and am glad you're going to keep blogging. :)
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