Thursday, April 28, 2011

Thwarting Murphy's Law

So, my strategy for dealing with this Homeowner Month of Doom is to not tempt fate. There are still two days left in April. These are two days for my washing machine and oven to die.

Thus, I have decided not to do any laundry. It wouldn’t do much good anyway. I ordered a new dryer from Lowes and it will be delivered on Saturday. I love Lowes at the moment. While their paint is not my favourite, their applicance department is rather nice. Also, the people are very helpful.

When I went to order my new dryer, they offered me next day delivery. Given that this month I have already:

1) Missed two hours of work for a termite inspection
2) Missed half a day of work while inspected termites were treated
3) Missed half a day of work because my fridge was being delivered
4) Missed two hours of work because I had to be home for my lawnmower to be delivered

I couldn’t help but think that saying to my boss that I had to miss yet another half day of work while my dryer was delivered and installed would not go over well also, not terribly believable. I mean, no one has that many homeowner issues in one month…right?

Ok, fine…yes, they do. That would be me…Captain Monkeypants, who I think might be a contender for the “Survivor of the Homeowner Month of DOOOOOM” award.

Anyway, back to my original point. I’m not doing any laundry due to not having a dryer. Also, due to the fact that if I try to use my washer, I’m expecting it to break.

I’m also not using my oven. I think it’s safe to use the burners because it’s an electric stove and I think they’re all wired separately so even if I kill a burner, I have three others that work. This is my theory at least. So far, it’s working.

Of course, I’m not taking any chances by actually using my burners tonight either. I will be using my microwave. I probably should be worried that the microwave will explode but it’s a fairly new microwave and, well, I do have to eat something.

In short, while I might think getting a new washer to match my dryer would be nifty, it can remain a nifty fancy for a while. And while my oven may not match my fridge, my oven is my old trusty that works rather well for an older oven. I’m quite fond of it with its little wind up clock that doesn’t work and built in wind-up clock-timer that also doesn’t work. Also, the self-cleaning function doesn’t work. However, the oven itself works and, as I recently discovered, so does the oven light.

The oven light discovered was more because I discovered an odd little sticking-up thingy on the top of my oven. The top of my oven has this nice little flat ridge where it’s easy to store things like olive oil, my Alton Brown Sodium Chloride Containment Unit, my peppermill and all other useful things you need to have readily available when you cook. The little sticking-up thingy was actually hidden under my teeny mortle and pestle that I got from TJ Maxx. One day, I moved the mortar and pestle and found the little sticking-up thingy. It appeared to be a button. So I pushed it. Lo and behold, it was an oven light!

This was actually about a year after I moved into my house. You may think it odd that it took me that long to notice it but, well, it did. I often see things I didn’t notice before in places I visit frequently. I find it a joyful process of discovery. This is another reason why I didn’t realize that the vent thingy on top of my house was a dryer vent. I never expected to see it there so I didn’t notice it. I only discovered it after my dad came down and I’d asked him to help me locate it. It was quite exciting to realize that the silver vent that had never registered in my notice but had always resided on my roof was a dryer vent.

I like things like that. It’s like in Rumplestiltskin really, isn’t it? I mean, in that story, the queen had to guess his name or give up her first born child. Even though she cheated and someone told her his name, she won and got to keep her baby.

Not that my dryer vent is like Rumplestiltskin. I mean, it’s not holding me hostage to a promise I made because my idiotic father told a king I could turn straw into gold. For one thing, there aren’t many kings around these days. Secondly, my father knows that telling anyone I could something as complex as spinning thread would be a little silly. Thirdly, who the heck really spins things on a spinning wheel these days anyway?

Uh, sorry….I digress. What my point is (and I DO have a point) is that everyday things that we don’t notice suddenly become Part of Our Lives once we know what they are and have meaning to us. They’re part of the background until something brings them to our notice and then they’re always there. We know where they are and can identify them readily.

So, anyway, this is all an explanation of why I didn’t know I had an oven light until I’d been using my oven for a year. It’s not like I had a manual for my oven- it’s over 20 years old.

Yet, it still works well enough for me to make a soufflé and have it rise perfectly. It also, so far, works well when I turn it on and try to cook things. This is why I will not be using my oven until April is over. It may not have anything to do with it being April but I have to grasp at something to blame for my expensive homeowner woes of late.

It’s either that or it’s my ghost that my dogs see and I do not.
I think I’d rather blame it on Murphy’s Law: Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. It’s just the way things work sometimes.

Of course, I’m quite ready for things to start going right. Nevertheless, I think I’ll stay away from my still-working major household appliances for a while just in case. It’s safer.

Happy Friday, have a great weekend and thanks for reading!

No comments: