Rainy Weekends, Ramps and Other Food Geekery...

It's Sunday evening already and the weekend is passing by far too quickly, as usual.

It's been a very wet weekend. The rain held off for most of Friday and Saturday but when it came, it really poured. We had torrential rain on Saturday night and now we're having a steady downpour that's been going on since about 2 p.m. On days like today, the only thing that seems right is to sit down on the sofa and enjoy a rainy evening.

The puppies don't care for the rain. I feel bad that they have to go outside to do their business. They try to resist quite hard but in the end, they're mostly willing to run out, do their thing and then come inside, soaked and ready to roll on the carpet to try themselves off.

Of course, at one point, during the beginning of the first torrential downpour on Saturday night, I realized they'd dragged all their soft toys outside and if they remained outside, they'd get so wet they couldn't be saved. So, silly Monkeypants that I am, I dived out into the downpour, retrieved their toys and ran inside. I did not roll on the carpet to dry off, however.

It's been a nice weekend. My parents came down to visit which is always fun. I got to make them lunch and spend time with them which is always a treat. It's a treat for the puppies too- I think they probably get sick of seeing just me all the time.

The nice thing about hanging out with my parents is that we don't have to do too much to be entertained. We spent a portion of the afternoon at IKEA. My dad had never been. I think, as most people are on their first visit to an IKEA, he was rather overwhelmed. He was also not keen on IKEA's stealthy way of making you pretty much have to navigate through the entire store to get out, therefore ensuring you will buy something. My mother bought a tea strainer. That's it. I was quite impressed. Of course, I didn't buy anything but then again, I did go last weekend so I didn't need anything. Not that I ever really need anything at IKEA but you know what I mean.

Of course, no visit from my parents is complete without a visit to Jungle Jim's. I never mind going there. I went last weekend but I can always find something to get excited about. At the moment, to my extremely geeky-food-lovin' joy, they have ramps. Most people don't know what a ramp is. I didn't until I saw Mario Batali use them on Iron Chef America. It merited investigation. A ramp is a wild leek that only grows, literally, for just a couple of weeks in the spring. As far as I know it's either hard or even impossible to cultivate. Since I've seen them used in several of Mario's recipes as well as in other places, I had the urge to try them. So, imagine my glee when Jungle Jim's had them. I got some last week and, I'm sort of embarrassed to admit, I squealed a little...only to realize that I was by myself and squealing over ramps was a bit strange. I cooked them using a Batali recipe for Spaghetti with Ramps. I used Linguine. It was delicious. So, this week, when I saw that they still had ramps and they'd lowered the price, I was extremely happy. I can't wait to use them.

Jungle Jim's, thus far, has proved to me that they pretty much supply everything a pretentious foodie like me could want from fresh quail eggs to cippolini onions to ramps. They've even had truffles and morels and different times. Alas, these are far to rich for my lowly salary but it's nice to know they have them. The one thing I haven't seen is fresh chanterelle mushrooms but I have no doubt that, in time, I'll see them. That's an ingredient I'm still longing to try.

My parents left a little while ago, the puppies are quietly chewing on their puppy teething rings I gave them and the rain is pouring outside. It's a pretty peaceful way to ease into the Sunday evening and a nice end to a quiet weekend.

Now I think I'll go and ponder what to do with my ramps and relax for the rest of the day. Tomorrow is Monday which means back to routine and back to work. However, I think that I'll take Scarlett O'Hara's words of wisdom about thinking about that tomorrow. Tomorrow is, after all, another day and why waste a perfectly good Sunday thinking about tomorrow.

Happy Monday (tomorrow!)

Weekends, IKEA and Blobby Kitchen Messes...

Somehow, it's managed to become Sunday again without my being fully aware of it. That's the thing about weekends, they're tricky. I'm still convinced that there's some weird time-space continuam thing where time slows down while we're at work but speeds up as soon as we have some free time.

Since it's Sunday evening, my free time is rapidly moving by and Monday morning looms closer. Since I plan on spending part of the evening with Jack Bauer on "24", I anticipate wildly-ridiculous plot points, a miraculous recovery for Jack who was formerly dying and lots of "Damn it!" spoken with Jack's trademark inflection. Naturally, I'm still looking forward to it.

I can't complain though. I've had a very productive weekend. I managed to clean and organize and my house is feeling much better. I also got to go to IKEA which is always dangerous. You go there for one thing and come out with ten. For example, I was looking for some shelves for my pantry. I managed to find something better- a unit with interchangeable drawers from baskets to tubs to fabric ones. Because it was IKEA, it was inexpensive. I also managed to buy some towels, some candles, two toy mice/rat things- one for me, one for my niece- heat pads for hot pans, tupperware-like containers and a rug. All I wanted were the shelves. Curse you IKEA for your inexpensive products that are very useful and have odd names.

Of course, I realized when I got home that my shelf/drawer unit thingy really did need that worktop that I thought I could live without. Having it would give me much more storage space on top. Also, it would make my pantry look tidier. Since my kitchen currently looked like a bomb had hit it because I'd taken everything out of my pantry, I ended up going back to IKEA for the worktop. I emerged with the worktop...and a set of washcloths to match my new towels and a 79 cent vase that I thought would look nice in my bathroom. Curse you, IKEA!

I'm willing to concede that it probably isn't really IKEA's fault. I really need to NOT put things in that handy blue bag you pick up when you walk in the door.

Aside from my IKEA trips, I also managed to finally watch "Julie and Julia." I'd been loaned the movie by a coworker but hadn't watched it. Then my good friend, Saz, gave me it as a Christmas gift so I figured it was time to watch it. You'd think I'd have done so much sooner since I'm a blogger and a foodie.

I found the movie entertaining. I like the idea and I admit, I could relate to Julie rather a lot. As a yet unpublished writer, having a blog is one way to feel better about writing. I like her idea too- cooking your way through that many recipes in a year would be fun and a challenge. Since I've recently become obsessed with cooking, i think it's a cool idea. Yet, like so many of those, someone else had it first. Now everyone else would be a copycat.

Yet the thing I like most is that Julie took on the project so she could finish something. It's good to have a goal like that. For me, that's what the National Novel Writing Month challenge was for. I actually spent the evening editing that novel and as horrible arrogant as it sounds, I made myself laugh out load a few times. In my defense, I haven't read the book since I wrote it and though I can't speak for other writers, for me, at least, when I'm writing, it's like being in a different world. I often just write and let the words flow out and not know what I wrote until I reread it a few days later. It seems alien, foreign...not something I created. It's like stepping out of your body and observing yourself from a distant point of view. You think, "I wrote that? The demon says that?" Sometime, it's the characters writing the story. For this last novel, I can't say that was the case. It just...happened.

Yet, like it was for Julie when she finished her 365 of cooking Julia Child's recipes, finishing a novel in a month was a feeling of accomplishment. Granted, unlike Julie, I don't have publishers, editors and the Food Network leaving me messages but that's ok. I can live with that.

Though it'd be super fantastic if the Food Network called me. Don't you think "Cooking with Captain Monkeypants" has an interesting ring to it?

I'm kidding. My food tastes pretty good but it never quite looks....pretty. For example, I made radacchio pancakes for lunch (Mario Batali's recipe, naturally) and while they were delicious, it really showed me that I haven't got the hang of presentation. The pancakes looked a bit like uneven, discoloured blobs of egg that were not round but more like, uh, clouds...misshapen, slightly awkward, blobby clouds. I really must work on my plating. Still, when it's just me, it doesn't matter. I'm just afraid that if I ever cook for someone else, they'll balk at the sight of my blobby, odd-looking food that makes the plate look messy even when I try to wipe it the way I see the chef'\s on TV do it.

Anyway, all in all, it's been a very nice, productive sort of weekend. The nice thing is that there's another one coming up in under six days.

If only that pesky work-week wasn't in between.

Happy Monday!

Mondays and Pig Heads...

Every Monday I complain that it's a Monday. Last week, I was irritated that Tuesday was Monday.

I can't really promise this week is going to be any different. I think I'm just going to have to admit that Monday mornings are just not fun. It doesn't matter if they're labeled as Monday or Tuesday on the calendar; they're still the sign that the weekend is completely over and only work days lie immediately ahead.

But that sounds so negative, doesn't it?

I'd like to begin this work week with a new attitude, a bright and shiny desire to excel at my job. Unfortunately, there really isn't much room to excel at my job which is, in itself, a sad fact. My company, as I've mentioned, is not particularly forward thinking and their acknowledgment that you're doing a good job is pretty much to let you stay employed. Awkward Bagel Days are usually only scheduled for new employees. When we have a barbecue, we have to bring in the food. I've been told that we used to get bonuses but I have a horrible feeling we won't because we're still struggling to find our feet after being sold earlier this year.

Still, our sweet Warm Vanilla Sugar squirting HR lady has taken it upon herself to give us small perks. Though I still hate the smell of that damn room spray, I do appreciate her efforts to give us these small perks. She buys Coke and Pepsi at the store and then charges us .25 cents a can for them. That's just a bargain, if you ask me. We were never allowed it before. One thing I've learned about my company is if you want to do something, you should just do it. Asking usually leads to getting a no or being made to feel guilty. This includes asking for time off or skipping lunch to leave 30 minutes early. The most they'll do is have a staff meeting in which we're all passive-aggressively scolded and told to stop whatever bad behaviour we were exhibiting. Everyone knows who actually did the deed, no one admits to it.

Anyway, despite this, I mostly do like my company. So, despite the fact that it's a Monday, I'm going to actually attempt to get some work done, even though I'll mentally be counting down the minutes until I can go home and relax.

I can't really complain about not getting relaxation time anymore. I had a nice relaxing weekend. I did make a trip to IKEA for some curtains. Naturally, I came out with the curtains in addition to several other items I had not planned to purchase. That's the problem with IKEA; they have all kinds of nifty gadgets and kitchen stuff and I can't resist. I was very restrained this time, however, and only bought a citrus zester and a melon baller. Of course, this was followed by a trip to Jungle Jim's International Market where I had fun wandering around and just looking. I discovered they sell entire pig heads. I was a wee bit alarmed by this. I probably wouldn't have been so alarmed but I'd just watched an Iron Chef America in which the secret ingredient was suckling pig. This basically amounted to a heap of baby piglets, heads on and looking cute but slaughtered lying there on my TV. When the chefs got hold of the piglets, it was indescribably disgusting. Let's just say they use every part of the piggy.

It would have disgusted me even if I hadn't been eating bacon at the time. I'd DVR'd the episode not knowing the secret ingredient, you see. Then I chose breakfast time to watch it. Fortunately, I'd eaten all the bacon by the time the piglets came on screen. Still, there's nothing more likely to put you off the breakfast than a chef lopping off Piglet's ears.

So, when I saw that giant pig head staring up at me in Jungle Jim from the captivity of its cellophane prison, I was a little taken aback. It looked like something from the Amityville Horror. They also had entire ducks heads packaged up. I know they're used a lot in Asian cuisine but I think I might have a hard time eating a duck head.

I will say, though, I find that sort of thing fascinating. It's also vaguely disgusting but still intriguing. When I lived in L.A. I used to enjoy going to the Asian markets with seafood counters. It was a little like going to an exotic zoo. There were live giant frogs, crabs crawling out of the mound upon which they were piled for sale, nasty looking clams that resembled yellow elephant trunks and, of course, tanks and tanks of live fish. I thought nothing of the tanks of fish until one day I saw one of the staff capture a giant fish and then violently club it over the head until it stopped thrashing. That was an eye-opening experience. Someone bought frogs once and I feared for the lazy-looking creatures but fortunately, they were just bagged up in a cellophane bag and taped tight. I happened to be behind the purchaser at the checkout and those frogs were still trying to leap to their freedom as the cashier rang them up.

I know it's all cultural; it seemed that as the minority in the store, I was also in the minority at being horrified/fascinated by such 'different' practices. I suppose if that's an everyday thing, you become desensitized to it; it seems almost normal. To me, I don't think it'll ever become normal. I actually hope it doesn't. I think I'd rather be slightly nonplussed at the sight of a giant pig head staring at me than accept that as an everyday thing.

I admit though, I did go back a second time to stare at the pig head in Jungle Jim's. It seemed like I wasn't the only one. I was behind a couple who were clearly on the Unusual Food tour of the store; looking, like I do, for the weirdest, most disgusting things to see. I admit, it's slightly wrong but it's also a new way to look at a grocery store. I love Jungle Jim's; they sell kangaroo meat, antelope meat and alligator in the same freezer section. That's pretty fascinating, you have to admit.

Anyway, so that was probably the most interesting thing I saw this weekend. Aside from that, I spent hours upon hours weeding my garden only to discover it didn't look like I'd done much at all. Although it does look better, there are still a ton of weeds there but my sore fingertips and stiff back belie a lot more work than it seems I did.

My neighbour with the yappy dog did come out a couple of times while I was outside. I only had to have one "pet the dog and make awkward conversation" encounter though. Otherwise, I just waved and ignored him. I feel a bit sorry for him anyway; his wife never seems to do anything outside, including grilling dinner. The only one I ever see doing any work is him. I wonder if he's as henpecked as he seems. Maybe he likes escaping into the garden to be the Dog Whisperer.

Still, with pig heads, weeding and IKEA, I had an interesting and productive weekend. Of course, in typing this, I just realized I'm having ham for dinner. I probably should have thought of that before I started talking about piglets and pig heads.

Oh dear.

Happy Monday.

IKEA, Cooking and a Rainy Start to the Week

It's a dark and stormy Monday morning. The sky is grey and heavy and looks like it's going to open any minute and launch a torrent onto the world beneath that is just waking up and trying to be motivated to go to work or school. It's one of those days where there's an ominous tone to the world, heavy with greys and shadows, the flowers looking as though they're trying to hide from the heavy rains that loom, imminent.

I know how they feel. I think most people do on Monday mornings. I have yet to meet a person who sits up and jumps out of bed saying "YAY! It's Monday!!!". If those people exist, they would frighten me.

I think my problem is that I like weekends too much. I love having two days that don't conform to the self-made pattern of my work weeks. I like knowing I can get up when I like, even if it is always around 9 a.m. at the latest. I like knowing I can read in bed if I still don't want to get up, that I can work out any time I choose.

This weekend was another good one. I spent the day on Saturday with a friend. We went to IKEA. I love IKEA. I love that you can go in there and spend less than $35 and come out with a ton of handy items, some of which you might actually need. I do need to make a note to myself that I really need to NOT watch "Iron Chef America' before I go to IKEA. You see, this leads me to do something I never thought I would ever do: Get excited over kitchen tools. I used to mock my friends and my dad for getting excited over odd contraptions like fancy peelers, sodium containment units (a fancy salt pot for those unfamiliar with Alton Brown and the Food Network) and chopping boards. This weekend, I went to IKEA and I got excited over a peeler and chopping boards and a French press coffee maker. Yes, I've crossed over to the dark side. You know you're in trouble when the lemon juicer just has to be yours because squeezing fresh lemons is far better than buying those plastic lemons full of concentrated lemon juice.

Stupid "Iron Chef."

Aside from IKEA, we browsed Barnes and Noble which, alas, did not have any copies left of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, a book that my friend really wanted to read and was kindly going to loan me. Yes, it's based on the original text of Pride and Prejudice but has, you know, zombies attacking the village of Meryton and it's up to Elizabeth Bennett and Proud Mr. Darcy to defeat them. What's not to like about that?

We also went to see a movie. We saw "State of Play". Yes, I know, I know, I've complained about that remake a couple of times. I can hear you thinking, "Wow, Captain Monkeypants is a hypocrite. She's supporting Hollywood in their horrid remake campaign." My defense is....an embarrassed shrug. It's true. I have no defense. I will merely apologise and move on.

Actually, I won't. You didn't really expect that, did you? My friend wanted to see it and it was the only movie starting at the time we wanted to see one. It had good reviews and, I confess, Iwas curious to see what they did with it. It was...ok.

The original is far, far better. I will say the movie did a fabulous job of condensing the mini-series which ran over five hours into a two hour movie. Russell Crowe was excellent in his role. Rachel McAdams was good, also. Ben Affleck played Ben Affleck very nicely. I was a little confused why Helen Mirren decided to act her role as though she were playing Bill Nighy playing her role. I mean, even her gestures were very similar to those of Mr. Nighy in the original. Over all, it was ok. I missed the James McAvoy role from the original and was disappointed that Jason Bateman's slimy character didn't have more screen time or a larger role but, as I said, it wasn't bad at all. I still say watch the original, it's much less polished, far grittier and far more believable. However, the BBC mini-series does lack Russell Crowe's spectacularly bad hairstyle, I'm sad to say.

The rest of my weekend was rather nice. I woke up on Sunday with the urge to cook. Stupid Food Network. Stupid Mario Batali. So, I cooked. I made homemade ravioli. I made the dough myself. It was ridiculously easy because Mario Batali told me it was and he's usually right. I stuffed it with roasted butternut squash and tossed it in a sage butter sauce. I also added a salad of sauteed beet greens topped with roasted beets.

You're scared, aren't you? Yes, me too. I think I might have officially watched too much "Iron Chef America". I will say that the meal was delicious, even though that sounds horribly self-congratulatory. My only problem is that I still lack a rolling pin and I, naturally, do not own a pasta rolling machine thingy so I had to use my infamous trick of using a wine bottle to flatten out the pasta dough. Thus, no matter how hard I pressed down, the dough remained thicker than it should. It was tasty...just thick. I like that I can try these recipes on myself and if they're revolting, I'm the only one who has to know. However, if it does turn out right, I can add that to my repetoire for when I do cook for others. It's fun. I'm planning on trying to cook in my parent's far better equipped kitchen soon. My dad has all the gadgets including a pasta rolling thingy. I plan on using my mother as my sous chef. She doesn't know this yet.

As for the house hunting, that was postponed by my realtor. We're going tonight, instead. I'm excited. It'll be interesting to see the difference between the fiction of the pictures I've been viewing of houses and the reality of the houses themselves. I think I'm prepared. I don't plan on falling madly in love with one place and putting all my hopes on that because I know that often, you have to make offers on a couple of places before you finally get one. The looking is the fun part. I plan on enjoying that.

So, thus ends the past week and today the new one begins. It's a little less stressful since the pressure of making it in the ABNA contest is off though, in the end, that turned out to be little stress, just a good rallying point for me to realize, once again, it's about the roadtrip, not the destination.

In a way, I like that it's raining. It seems fitting for a Monday morning. I'm sure as the week passes, the clouds eventually will too. In the meantime, they provide a convenient excuse for my Monday sluggishness, not the fact that I stayed up too late reading. I shall, to quote Milli Vanilli, those old pop "singers" of yore, "Blame it on the rain." Why not?

Happy Monday.