Really Random Musings...

There are times in life when you are engaged in activities that allow for a form of meditation. I’m not talking about the ‘Zen’ type of meditation or any other type of spiritual meditation. I’m talking about the type that happens when you’re doing something like, say, driving or even tiling a floor that requires concentration but also allows you to empty your brain and let the thoughts flow.

Since I had a lot of time this weekend to ‘mediate’ while tiling a floor as well as on my short drive to work each day, I realized I had quite a few random thoughts that tended to occupy my mind. Since this blog is called ‘random musings’, I figured that I might as well share them with you because making lists is sort of fun. Please don’t judge me for some of them. We all know I’m a little odd at times.

Things that popped into my mind either while I was tiling the floor or driving to work:

1) Why some songs just get stuck in your brain for no reason. I currently have that annoying “Keep on Keeping On” jingle from Chase Bank in my head. It keeps going around and around. I don’t even bank at Chase. Grr.

2) Why there are vans for FedEx with FedEx Express printed on them. Does that mean it’s a Federal Express Express van? Why the repetition?

3) HBO’s Game of Thrones. For a show based on a book I’ve never read, it certainly does take up a lot of my brainpower. When I was tiling this weekend, it pretty much kept cropping up. It’s like my brain is trying to solve a mystery that I don’t think really exists. Most odd.

4) Why does one side of my lawn grow much faster than the other? It’s weird. I mow the whole thing to keep it even but it’s only one side that really needs it.
5) Why does Rory Gilmore, my somewhat active dachshund, suddenly decide to plop herself down on the grass and refuse to move when we’re on a walk whereas Sookie wants to keep moving?

6) Why does Mrs. Enormous Trousers insist on telling me everything when I step outside to walk the dogs? Last night, I learned that her daughter thought she needed to wear a better bra, that Mr. Enormous Trousers had to buy new pants and that he got a haircut. All of this while it’s 93 degrees out and the dogs clearly aren’t in the mood to stand around.

7) Why Son of Dog Whisperer is surprised when he falls of his bike because he’s riding around, trying to do it no handed with his eyes closed while wearing no shirt or shoes and resembling a lobster because clearly he didn’t have any sunscreen on all day.

8) Why Canadian geese will decide to settle and nest in the most random places. Also, why is their feces green and why is it so messy?

9) Why I despise Gordon Ramsey so much. I tried to give “Masterchef” a go last night and it made me cringe. He’s so clearly acting up for the cameras with his drama of “TRUFFLE OIL OFFENCE! YOU SHOULD BE SHOT” and his dramatic fingers to his mouth exclamations of “Damn” when he clearly is disappointed in a contestant. Also, these are HOME COOKS- they may not know that in the cheffing world, Truffle Oil is the Oil of the Devil. Perhaps, if you stopped gagging and exclaiming over how offensive and wrong it is, you might politely TEACH her something.

10) I can’t stand fishlips on people. This is a mean and horrible thing today but there are people- mostly men- who have these tiny little lips in enormous chins and they give me the icks. The large judge on “Masterchef” has fishlips and I find them just…unpleasant.

11) Worms. After our last major rainstorm a couple of weeks ago, there was a huge population of worms writing on the sidewalks. Then when it got hot, they dried up and died. Why didn’t they wriggle to safety? Also, I really wish Rory would not try to eat these dried up worms on our walks. People will think I don’t feed her properly when, in fact, I feed her a little TOO well.

12) Squirrels…I’m not a fan but I’m amazed at their ability to climb a tree while holding onto a large object. In recent months, I’ve seen squirrels race up a tree holding a drink can, a near-empty can of Busch’s baked beans, a whole slice of pizza and a bunch of grapes. I’m not sure where the grapes came from.

13) Weeds. Why didn’t my seeds grow but weeds have no problem propagating and multiplying in the same soil?

14) Food. I think about food a lot. Usually I plan my dinner ahead of time. Yesterday, I planned on arroz con pollo tacos for dinner and since I used the tomato juice for the marinade, I had leftover tomatoes in a can so tonight, I’m having gnocchi with roasted red pepper and tomato sauce. Tomorrow, I’ll probably do something with asparagus, gnocchi and white wine. Yes, I’m obsessed. However, healthy good cooking takes some planning and creativity.

15) Why I lost my love for going to the cinema to watch a movie. Aside from “Harry Potter,” there’s nothing on my summer “Must See” list. A couple of years ago, I saw most of the major releases in a theatre. It might have something to do with the fact that ticket prices seem to creep up 50 cents more each time I go.

16) Is a movie in 2011 that is #1 at the box office really breaking records or is it that ticket prices are almost double what they were ten years ago and it just looks like movies are making more money?

17) Where are my hubcaps going? I’m now missing two. I have no idea where one of them went. One, I suspect, was pilfered when I left my car overnight in a train station car park a couple of years ago. The other one…it was just gone.

18) What do those Magnum ice-cream bars taste like? Since I’m trying to be healthy and watch my calorie intake, chances are one of those things would either have to be consumed by me on a ‘cheat day’ when I’m allowed to eat what I want or as an entire meal on a normal day. They look yummy but is it worth the calorie expenditure?

19) Chewing tobacco. That stuff is nasty. My coworker chews it and has a cup in his car that he spits in. He knows it’s vile but he does it anyway. What possesses someone to start doing it in the first place? Smoking…well, not that I’m a fan but it seems to make more sense. Why not chew Big League chew or something?

20) Writing. I still do it although I’m currently waiting for my proof of “Emmy goes to Hell” to arrive so I can move on to a new project. Is it worth writing a new novel or should I consider retiring into the oblivion in which I feel that I belong?

21) What should I do with my bathroom? It’s hideous. My dad has plans to help me remodel but while I think it’s lovely of him to help and he will eventually get it done, his timetable always needs to have a couple more weeks or even months added to it. Since it involves taking out my only bath/shower, I’m a wee bit worried about how long it’d take to replace them. Also, since his plan includes taking out wallboard and sawing the bath in half, methinks a weekend will NOT be enough to get it done.

22) Why do I like Target so much and why is it impossible to leave there without getting at least double the amount of stuff I planned to buy?

23) Will teleportation ever exist? It’d be nifty to get somewhere distant without hopping on a plane.

24) When the pups and I were walking the other day, there was a sock lying in the street several blocks away. I’ve been missing one of those socks for a while and I bought them in the wholesale district of Los Angeles a couple of years ago. What is the likelihood that it was actually my sock and, if so, how on earth did it get there?

25) Why don’t they make seasonal summer pencils? I like to write with pencils and I have pencils that reflect the major upcoming events (Christmas, Halloween, Easter, Valentines’ Day…). Why can’t I find pencils that reflect summer. It’s not fun to write with a boring pencil or one that’s out of season.

Thanks for reading!

Happy Wednesday!

Food, Glorious Food!

I haven’t had a food blog in a while.

This is actually pretty amazing given how much of my thought processes are devoted to food. I won’t share it with you because it’s a bit ridiculous but, well, let’s just say that whenever my brain is not focused on something specific, it tends to go to food.

It’s actually quite amazing that I’m not a 600 pound blob. I did get a bit blobby there for a while but fortunately thanks to self-discipline, I’ve managed to lose a little of the blobbiness. Also, it was most likely also due to the fear of my blobbiness showing through when I shed my winter clothing in all of its fabulous camouflaging layers in favour of a far less forgiving summer wardrobe.

Currently, my food obsession is due to the fact that for her mother’s day present, my mum is letting me cook dinner for her and my dad. I’ve decided to do a 5-course tasting menu which translates as five small courses. Since I want it to be surprise for her, I’ll wait until next week before I reveal my menu but needless to say, I’m a little too excited about it.

Planning a meal like this is a lot of fun for me. Not only do I get to plan the menu but I also get to go shopping for the ingredients and make out my time table. Then I get to cook.

This sounds a little nerdy but the fact is, I do know this and as I (and GI Joe) always say , knowing is half the battle.

I’m planning a menu that is geared towards my parents’ taste. It’s simple flavours that require a little complexion in cooking which is my favourite way to cook.

I still find it ironic that just a couple of years ago, my idea of cooking was to open a jar of spaghetti sauce and serve it with premade garlic bread and a bag of salad. Nowadays, I refuse to buy a jar of sauce- it’s so much easier to make your own and way tastier. Also, I’m a snob. I like to chop the veggies for the salad. I like to make my own garlic bread.

Nowadays, thanks to the wisdom and guidance of Mario Batali, Top Chef and the Food Network, I now am in love with cooking. It’s fun. It’s therapeutic.

And, best of all, you get to EAT. I love to eat.

So, planning an elaborate meal is a treat for me. I’m very organized, I think. I have a little notebook that I use. It’s actually a handmade notebook that my good friend at RadLinc crafts made for me. It’s very useful. I write down my ideas for the meal first. Then I figure out my ingredient list. Then I plan the shopping and where I need to go to get the ingredients. Finally, I figure out what preparation is involved, the schedule for cooking and how long it will take.

It sounds complicated. It is, I suppose. Yet it works. My mother and I employed this method during our last two thanksgivings and it made cooking for 14 people much, much easier. It’s very micro-manager-y but, well, whatever it takes.

Sometimes, I think it might have been fun to be a chef. Then I realize that it would not only involve having to work your way up in restaurants where you’d work with arrogant chefs who aren’t exactly the kind and cuddly type. I mean, just listening to Gordon Ramsey shout “YOU F-ING DONKEY!” and watching the cheftestants on “Top Chef” and their horrible behavior is enough to put me off for life. Granted, it’s a cooking competition so they’re not at their nicest but some of those chefs are MEAN.

I’m a realist. I think if I had my own little café where I had a changing menu that wasn’t too extensive would be fun. However, it’s not likely to happen because restaurants are hard work, no matter what the size. Also, while I adore cooking at home, I think the bloom would fall off the rose quickly if it became a ‘job’ and not a hobby.

So, I’ll stick to my pretensions at home and leave the restaurant cooking to real chefs.

Still, I do enjoy getting to cook for other people. It’s a lot of fun and it’s nice when they like what I cook.

Also, if I steal ideas from cookbooks, it’s forgiven for a home cook. Apparently, according to Gordon Ramsey, it’s a cardinal sin for a chef. I’ve seen him berate restaurant owners more than once for using cookbooks on Kitchen Nightmares. While I still use cookbooks, I’ve started to branch out and focus on ‘flavour profiles’ rather than straight recipes. This basically means knowing what works with food combinations and what doesn’t and then working with that. It’s a learning process but it’s definitely something I’m enjoying learning.

I don’t like Gordon Ramsey. I think that might be clear. While I think he probably is a good chef, I don’t like the way he shouts at people. I don’t like that he gets VERY close to them and makes them look at his sweaty face so he can Teach Them a Valuable Lesson. I also don’t think he makes very good Yorkshire puddings but that’s sort of irrelevant. Finally, I don’t like that sometimes on Kitchen Nightmares, he uses his high falutin’ chef ways to insult people instead of stopping to think that maybe what they were doing wasn’t necessarily wrong but just different to what he knows.

I digress. Anyway, I also don’t like that Gordon insulted my beloved Mario Batali. That’s probably really why I don’t like him. Mario taught me to cook so he is my Yoda. He doesn’t know he taught me to cook but that’s ok. I’m happy just using his fabulous recipes and techniques to make good food.

I’m actually also excited because at the end of this month, my friend Saz and I are taking a 20th ‘Friendiversary” trip to New York. Obviously, we’re celebrating 20 years of being friends. I actually managed to get us a reservation at Babbo for a decent time. Babbo, of course, is Mario Batali’s restaurant. I know he won’t be cooking there but it will be enough for me to eat from a menu he created.

In short, if you haven’t figured it out, I love food. This is why I blog about it quite a lot and why I think about it so much. It’s something to share and something human beings all have in common: We all need to eat. It’s a universally safe topic for most people. It represents culture. It represents geographic region.

It represents humans. I think that’s a pretty cool thing.

Happy Thursday and thanks for reading!