The Mystery of the Hickory Nuts...

I have a mystery to solve.

It involves hickory nuts.

As you know, I recently bought my own house. I'm still getting used to being a homeowner but I'm slowly getting the hang of it...I think.

My yard was tree-less when I moved in. Last September, a couple of weeks before I moved, Ohio was hit with some massive wind-storms. There was a lot of damage to trees all over the part of the state in which I live. My current backyard did have two trees in it but they had to be chopped down because of the damage to them as did my neighbour's trees. Thus, my garden had absolutely no trees in it until Saturday on which day, I changed that by planting a little Japanese cherry tree.

I did have two trees on the strip of grass in front of my house. It's between the sidewalk pavement and the road and everyone in our neighbourhood is responsible for mowing this strip of grass. In my grass strip were two rather nice maple trees. They may not really be maple since I'm prone to only recognizing trees when they either have fruit on them or they still have the tag from the nursery where they were purchased on them. Yet, for the purpose of this blog, they're maple trees.

One day, a couple of weeks ago, I came home from work. I was talking to my mother on the phone and I looked out the front window. Something looked different. I slowly realized one of my trees was gone. It wasn't an old tree; it had only been planted a couple of weeks ago. Yet...there it was...gone...with only a stump remaining.

Naturally, I was baffled. I know that tree had been there when I'd left for work. Yet there were no traces of sawdust, no twigs, no fallen branches. It was just...gone.

I went to check out the stump. There were no clues.

I began to suspect that perhaps there was a Tree Serial Killer around, a crazed lumberjack who chopped down trees like a phantom so that all that remained was a stump.

I tested my theory on a coworker who has little time for my imagination. Thus, she suggested that I contact the City where I live and find out.

I decided that might not be a bad idea. So I emailed them, giving them my Crazed Lumberjack theory as a possible explanation. I got a polite reply that did not mention a lumberjack at all. Instead, the City Tree Person said that my tree had been damaged in the wind-storm last year and had been tagged for chopping for a while. Unfortunately, the nice lady who lived in my house before me forgot to mention that. Thus, while it may look like my tree was randomly taken, it was, in fact, scheduled to be removed.

While I was happy to find out the answer, I was a little sad that the mystery had such a simple solution.

However, I'm both pleased and a little scared to report I might have another mystery on my hands, as I mentioned in my blog opening: The Mystery of the Appearing Hickory Nuts.

For those non-nut-knowing folk, a hickory nut begins in this rather large green husk, the size of a tennis ball. When they're ripe, the husks split as the nuts fall from the tree, releasing the nuts. When they're unripe, they remain in their green tennis-ball-form, unable to be opened without force and great mess.

Last week, I was outside watering my plants when I noticed a hickory nut that was sitting in the very corner of my house on a little ledge that runs around the side of my house. It's only about two inches wide, large enough upon which to sit a hickory nut but not large enough that a squirrel could scurry around upon it. I knew that hickory nut hadn't been there before because I often go for a walk outside and look around that area to make sure there aren't any scary spiders. That night, there weren't any spiders...just a green-yellow unripe hickory nut.

Scenerios ran in my mind as to how that nut got there but I finally dismissed it, throwing the nut back into my weed patch and deciding not to worry about it unless another nut appeared.

This weekend, when I weeded, I found that nut in my geraniums and I tossed it towards the end of my yard. I tried to locate the hickory tree from which it must have fallen but I'm still not sure which tree that might be. See comment above regarding my recognition of trees.

I didn't give that hickory nut much thought again. I'd talked myself into thinking that perhaps that nut really had sat in the corner of my ledge the entire time I'd been living in my house and I hadn't noticed it.

Until last night.

I was in my kitchen, making tortilla soup and relaxing. I like making soup because it involves lots of chopping and I love to chop. I happen to glance out my window.

There, on the grill I had just moved to my deck, sat a green hickory nut.

Now, while I'd like to think there's a very muscular, very agile squirrel out there who can somehow climb onto the grill even though it's not anchored anywhere, I admit...I'm a little dubious about that theory.

My problem is that I watch too much television, too many movies and read too many books. My imagination has gone a little wild.

Firstly, I thought of some weird witchcraft. That's what I get for watching The Blair Witch Project fairly recently. In that movie, the Blair Witch Evil Thing leaves twigs outside the victim's tents. Then they die.

I'm hoping that hickory nut isn't like those twigs. That would be bad.

I looked up the meaning of a hickory nut. Apparently, it doesn't have much meaning. After much digging, I did discover that the Druids and wiccan folk believe that the hickory nut is linked to abundance, wholeness, power, presence, command, discipline, acquisition, giving of gifts, and the finding of direction.

Well, it'd be nice to find some direction, I admit. I'm just not sure how, exactly, a mystery hickory nut is going to help me find that.

Then again, it also represents a giving of gifts. Maybe someone is leaving me hickory nuts as a gift.

I even entertained the idea that the bunny that I see on my lawn every day is leaving the nuts. Naturally, the logical thought that bunnies can't climb followed shortly after. I did think for a brief moment how nice it would be if the bunny was really some prince or hero in disguise and the hickory nuts were a clue for how I could release him. That only lasted 30 seconds. I might have a vivid imagination but I'm also a realist. I'm not sure how heroic a prince might be after spending at least a couple of months hiding under my tool shed and enjoying a night snack on my lawn.

Still, despite all the ideas I came up with, I really don't have a good one for the hickory nuts that are appearing. As it got darker, I started to have a little less bravado and a little scarier thoughts. People are weird. The only way those nuts could really have got there was if a human put them there. What if that Crazed Lumberjack was not as fictional as I thought? What if someone was coming into my yard while I slept? This thought is particularly scary when you're lying in the dark, the house creaking a little because it's old with the windows open to let in the cool air. I have a one-level house. My bedroom window is right beside that grill where I found the second hickory nut.

Needless to say, I didn't sleep well. I had horrid dreams. I made sure my blinds were closed but I still felt paranoid, in case someone really was out there.

This morning, naturally, I feel a little silly for having such an overactive imagination. When I looked out of the window at the dark dawn outside, all I saw in the twilight was that bunny, having his breakfast by eating the grass at the base of my new tree. There was no lumberjack, no creature lurking in the shadows that I could see.

The hickory nut was still there.

That, at least, I hadn't imagined.

I'm sure there's a logical explanation for it. I just can't come up with one. I'll let you know if another one appears. Or if the Crazed Lumberjack shows up. Or it's a new Blair Witch. Or if the bunny turns out to be more than a bunny.

In the meantime, I think I should probably control my imagination a little better. It might make sleep easier.

But if you can come up with a theory for me on how these nuts are getting where they're getting, I'd appreciate it.

Happy Wednesday.

So, uh, About that Ice-Storm

So, about that ice-storm. Not much to say other than: Now is the time on Captain Monkeypants when she eats her words.

We had an ice-storm last night. Actually, it began yesterday afternoon. Unfortunately, none of us in the office could tell because it merely looked foggy and damp outside. I discovered it was actually freezing drizzle as soon as I headed out to my car and almost went flying. Not fun. The annoying thing about freezing rain and drizzle, as I've mentioned, is that it's pretty. It really does turn everything into a glass-encased landscape in which everything has been preserved.

The only problem is that it's a nightmare to walk on and scary to drive on. That is, of course, if you can even get your car defrosted enough to drive. Freezing rain does not mean a thin little layer of frost on a car as is common on cold mornings. Instead, it is a layer of 1/4 inch ice that literally has to be chiseled through with an ice-scraper to get to the car window below. It took me ten minutes to scrape my car last night when I got out of work. Since the storm had recently begun, the roads were very slippery and no matter how slow you went, it was hard not to fishtail when going through intersections.

This morning wasn't so bad. I warmed my car up which allowed the ice to gently melt from beneath. This meant when I scraped, it broke off in wet sheets and allowed me to clear off my windows fairly easily. The city had put salt on the roads, it was just the parking lots which were like ice rinks.

And, by the way, I did not see my stray hitchiker skating in the parking lot. I was disappointed.

So far, the office is quiet. Most people have kids here being that it's the Midwest and the traditional lifestyle is to marry fairly young and settle down. Their kids have school delays and thus their parent's can't come to work until their kids are safely deposited on the bus or in school. There are a few of us here, clustered in our cubicles, waiting for the morning buzz to begin. Outside, the daylight is starting to creep in, revealing the polished glow of an ice-coated world. Inside, I drink my slightly-vile coffee and hope that we get the snow that's forecast, rather than the ice that threatens.

Though I wouldn't say it was the Dooming Event that my coworkers predicted yesterday, it is definitely a wake-up call that winter isn't always about fluffy snowfalls and hot chocolate. Like every part of nature, Winter has a sharp, shadowed edge that can surprise you with its danger, rather like hippos and platypi.

(Side note: Did you know that hippos are vicious and deadly? I always thought they were cute, dopey things a bit like cows but I watched this special on Animal Planet and wow, hippos are vicious. Also, platypi (plural of platypus, I think) are venomous. I didn't know that. I always thought of platypi as fun, cute, playful things. Not so much)

Anyway, my point is that Winter woke me up yesterday. She reminded me that she has many skills and colours and that she doesn't like to be too predictable. I forgot that and now the crystalized world outside my door has reminded me that not all things that are beautiful are safe.

As a bit of a control freak, I need reminders once in a while that things aren't always under my control. Nature's good at reminding me of that. Next time the weather warns of a Storm Watch, I won't mock until enough time has passed that I know we're safe. In the meantime, I'll drive more slowly, walk more tentatively and respect Nature a little more.

Happy Wednesday.

What is it About Trees?

It's Friday again. Last week, I blogged about how much I liked Fridays. Then I had a car wreck on Saturday and the promise and freedom of my weekend lost its charm somewhat. So, I don't think I'm going to blog about how much I like Friday's today....just in case.

Instead, I'm just going to blog about nice things because it's the end of the week. For example, yesterday, I actually got to go outside during the day time which doesn't always happen. It was a beautiful day. The sky was that cornflower blue that makes you want to lie down and just stare up at it. There were clouds but they were the white and fluffy wisps that were so high up, it was almost as if they were deciding whether they wanted to stay. It was a quite chilly but it not as cold as it has been. I was outside to meet the insurance man from the company of the lady that hit me. While he was inspecting my car, I looked around and I saw a tree that I've seen every day since I started working here. Yet this time I really noticed it. It was still that light green that you expect to see in the spring, almost a newborn-leaf green. There was a slight yellow tint to the leaves that was the only indication that the tree had recognized the autumn until yesterday. Yet the leaves were falling off, steadily, as if the tree had just realized it was supposed to be dropping its leaves. The leaves fell in shifts. One batch would fall, gently floating to the ground, gracefully landing and as soon as they landed, the next batch would fall. I watched the tree for several minutes and it continued. It was almost like watching a carefully choreographed ballet and it was hard to turn away and give my attention back to the insurance man.

This morning, I made a point to notice the tree and it is now just like all the other trees, the remaining leaves are scarce and now there's a carpet of yellow-edged green beneath it that will, I'm sure, turn brown and melt back into the ground. It was another of those things that make me happy to have moved back to the midwest.

I'm also determined to try to make this a good Halloween. I had planned to go back to stay with my parents this weekend. I love doing that anyway but after my rather stressful weekend, I really wanted to go; sort of a way to soothe my ruffled feathers and relax for a couple of days. Also, it means I can do my laundry or, since I have a wonderful mother, get my laundry done for me (thanks, again, mum...I really do know how to do laundry but you're lovely to do it for me :)). I actually don't mind doing the laundry...it's the folding I hate. Apparently, I'm a horrible folder. I never thought much of it; ok, so it was wrinkled a bit but...isn't that normal? However, having watched several expert t-shirt folders in action, I've realized that...folding isn't my forte. I tend to fold one shirt nicely and then get bored and it becomes an attempt to fold the rest into tiny little packages with no regard for how that happens.

I'm digressing. Anyway, so I'm not going to be able to go to my parents this weekend because I can't get my car fixed until next week and I'm a bit reluctant to drive 100 miles each way, just in case something falls off. The rear bumper is hanging off and there's a lot of hills on the way. I'm a bit worried about going down a hill and leaving my bumper behind. It's probably safer to wait until next week. This means that I won't be able to see my nephews and nieces dress up for Halloween. It also means I have no plans. I always feel like I should do something for Halloween but somehow I never get around to it. Well, actually, that's not entirely true. A couple of years ago, I did win tickets from KROQ and got to go to the Black Parade party in which My Chemical Romance played at a really small venue. That was pretty cool.

But that's pretty much the extent of my Halloween celebrations. I'm not sure what I should do. Maybe I should rent horror films. It's hard to find good ones though. Nowadays, most horror films are just....silly. I like ones in which the horrific situation is actually realistic, the movie begins to creep under your skin slowly, enveloping you so that you feel jumpy when a strange noise in your own house occurs. I don't like those silly teenage movies where they have a lot of sex and then die in some horrific manner. Some of them start out with an interesting idea like "Final Destination". That one was pretty decent, actually. Except...then there were sequels. How final can a Final Destination be when there are sequels? I mean, shouldn't they then rename the earlier films to things like and "Not quite Final but Almost There Destination" and "Finaler Destination?"

I think one of my favourite creepy films is "The Sixth Sense". I know the plot twist now, of course, but I still get a bit of a start when Haley Joel Osment is at his school and turns to see those people just hanging there. Or when he's in his home-made tent and he's suddenly cold and you know something's going to jump out but it still makes your heart jump when it does.

Of course, that's when M. Night Shyamalan should have stopped making movies. I mean, did you see "The Happening?" It has to be one of the most deliciously awful films I saw this year. Mark Wahlberg is in it and he's bad. Granted, he's not, exactly, uh Robert DeNiro in the best of films but...he can be entertaining. Not in "The Happening". In that one, he delivers speeches very earnestly, as if convincing himself that choosing to be in this movie was a good idea. The female lead, Zoey Deschanel who is usually quite decent is...awful. She has to constantly tell people she can't show emotion. It's probably not her fault but...well....she's bad. The movie is bad. It seems to be a way for Mr. Shyamalan to let out some steam; there are so many gratuitiously violent deaths that by the time the man lies down in front of his lawnmower, I was groaning. I am happy to spoil the movie for you. It's about trees. Trees that are angry because humans suck. So they start letting out a toxin that causes people to kill themselves in lots of disgusting, violent ways. But in the end, the love of two people makes the trees calm down and stop killing people...at least that's what I think happened. Except then the trees start killing people in Paris. Which I thought was called "The City of Love". Which means that maybe the trees are fed up with people being in love by that point.

Just take my word for it; it was a horrible film. Yet it's also one of those that I think is going to become a cult classic because it seems almost deliberately awful. Unfortunately, I don't think Mr. Shyamalan made it to be that way. He's slowly been increasing in awfulness since...well...."The Sixth Sense". He seems to have lost himself in his own brilliance which, by now, sadly seems to be a fluke. Ever since the aliens were destroyed by a glass of water in "Signs", I've seen his movies merely because I knew they were going to be bad. Sometimes, it's just good to have guilty pleasures.

So, maybe I will rent scary movies tonight in honour of it being Halloween. I think I'll be avoiding the M. Night Shyamalan ones though. Maybe I'll rent "Poltergeist". That has a killer tree in it. Now that tree was scary. I used to have one outside my bedroom window when I was a kid and after I saw "Poltergeist", I was terrified of it. I kept expecting it to reach through my window and grab me, suck me in and eat me alive. I think I prefer that method to "The Happening"'s though. At least that tree was pro-active...it did the killing; it didn't just make people kill themselves. M. Night Shyamalan made trees seem lazy.

Anyway, obviously, I didn't know what to blog about when I sat down. It apparently is a blog about trees. The pretty ones that are outside the window and the Killer Trees that Hate Us. I prefer my trees to be like the one outside my window, gently giving in to the change of the seasons and letting me appreciate it's beauty. I'd hate to think that tree is secretly plotting ways to kill me....it seems so...calm.

Ok, on that note, I could digress and talk about other trees like the ones in Lord of the Rings that could talk and move and stuff but then that would make me seem like a giant nerd and we can't have that. So, I shall bid you adieu for the week and hope you have a more exciting Halloween than mine is likely to be. Just watch out for the trees....

Happy Halloween.