Why Hollywood Needs to Stop With the Remakes

So, I just read something online that irritated me rather a lot. They’re remaking “Dirty Dancing.”

I’d say I don’t know why they’re remaking “Dirty Dancing” but, really, I do…it’s Hollywood and they appear to have thrown creativity out the window in favour of trying to make a quick profit.

It’s sad and rather ridiculous, honestly. I mean, ok…so “Dirty Dancing” wasn’t exactly “Casablanca” or “The Godfather” to begin with. It’s a slightly cheesy film with some rather silly dialogue (“I carried a watermelon,” and “Nobody puts Baby in a corner!” come to mind) but, over time, that dialogue has become classic, quotable and instantly recognizable. There are movies that are just good and then movies like “Dirty Dancing” which come out and everyone just…loves. Take my dad, for example. “Dirty Dancing” is one of his all-time favourite films. Granted, his taste isn’t very…great to begin with, I mean the man must have watched “Starship Troopers” more times than is humanly necessary. However, there’s something about “Dirty Dancing” that made it one of those little movies that could. It resonated with our generation.

When “Dirty Dancing” first came out on video, my friend Amy and I would have sleepovers. We’d creep downstairs after my parents had gone to bed and watch movies. My parents knew but they just couldn’t sit through the same movies over and over the way we could. Amy had a crush on Patrick Swayze so we ALWAYS had to watch “Dirty Dancing.” I (yes, I’m ashamed to admit it) had a huge thing for Tom Cruise and we had to watch “Top Gun” a lot. We were creatures of habit and we knew what we liked.

Even now, I can watch “Dirty Dancing” with a certain fondness. It’s a little dated but it’s still fun. It’s still got that ‘magic’ that made it a phenomenon.

And yet now Hollywood wants to remake it. The original choreographer from “Dirty Dancing” is going to direct.

It seems as though this is happening more and more. We didn’t need a new “Arthur,” but we got one and it was pretty awful. We didn’t need a new “Karate Kid” but we got one and while it featured Will Smith’s cute son, it lacked the fun cheesiness of the real Mr. Miyagi’s waxing on and waxing off. We’re getting a remake of “Footloose” whether we like it or not and I’m sure it’s going to be terrible. Ok, so rewatching the original shows it to be horrible dated. Kevin Bacon’s exclamation of “Jump Back!” when he finds out there’s not dancing allowed in town alone makes the film completely cheesy and silly. Yet it’s a fun cheesy and silly because when “Footloose” originally came out, you couldn’t resist taping your toe and wanting to leap up and dance along to the theme song. It was the 1980’s and it worked.

Maybe the remake of “Footloose” will be good. I’m not holding my breath. It’s too soon to be remaking films from the 1980’s. Give it another 20 years and maybe we’ll talk then. If I, someone in my mid 30’s can still remember renting the video as a new release, it’s too soon. Sorry, but it is.

I have no hopes for “Dirty Dancing’s” remake. Why bother in the first place? The chemistry between Jennifer Grey and Patrick Swayze made the film what it was. You can’t recreate that. The thrill of waiting for the climactic dancing that follows, “No one puts Baby in a corner!” won’t be the same. You can’t recreate a movie that wasn’t manufactured to be a huge hit….it just became one.

The sad this is, as I said earlier, I know why Hollywood is doing it. They want to make money and they don’t want to lose it. “Dirty Dancing” won’t cost a fortune to make because it doesn’t have any need for flashy effects or big-name actors. It may make some money because the tweenies and teens who think the old one is dated might go see it. More than likely, it’ll be aimed at Glee crowd just as so much crap is these days. Glee appears to be the television equivalent of “Twilight”. It was a huge hit and Hollywood is trying to figure out how to bottle that success and find it elsewhere. They do it by releasing shows and movies that will appeal to the same audience. This is how we got “Red Riding Hood” which is a perfectly awful movie that clearly was made from the same mould as “Twilight” and is just as ridiculous. It’s why we have “The Glee Project” on TV and several other shows about singing and dancing.

It’s just sad though. I probably have a skewed perspective because when I moved to L.A. ten years ago, it was to attempt to become a screenwriter. The trouble was is that without knowing anyone in the industry, there was nothing but closed doors and lack of interest. I think I had some good ideas and I think I could write well but there was no way in. I met other young screenwriters like me who also had the same problem- we couldn’t get read because we weren’t anyone important and there was no time for us.

I’m sure that even though I gave up screenwriting in favour of novel writing, there are still thousands of writers who move to L.A. each year for the same reason. They have great scripts and great ideas but they can’t get an agent to give them the time of day. If they’re lucky enough to pitch their ideas, they rarely go anywhere. It’s disheartening.

I’m sure that some of these unknown screenwriters have actual, real, great ideas. I’m sure some of them even have fantastic scripts. They can’t get the time of day because behind the studio’s creative doors, you’ve got some moron saying, “Hey, let’s remake “Dirty Dancing!”

You get my point. It’s easier for Hollywood to make a quick buck than take a risk and maybe win. Easy and cheap always wins over risky any day. It’s business, it’s not personal.

It’s just when they take something like “Dirty Dancing” that feels as personal as an old, beloved friend you’ve known for more than half your life, it feels rather personal.

Still, it’s going to happen anyway. I suppose we should be lucky that it’s a 20 year old movie. Since they’re already rebooting “Spiderman” even though the Tobey McGuire version is not that old, you have to be thankful that they’re not remaking more recent films. The last thing we need is them to start remaking the “Harry Potter” movies. I mean, after all, the first one is around ten years old now after all.

Nevertheless, I live in hope that this creative drought in Hollywood may end soon and we’ll be back to original scripts. One can always dream, I suppose.

Happy Wednesday!

The Mediocrity of Movies

I used to see a lot more movies than I do these days. For a while there, I was a movie junkie. I'd go to the theatre to see anything that appealed. I used to love the temptation of the popcorn-infused air, sitting down in a cool, dark theatre and just losing myself in the movie. Granted, if I didn't like it, I wasn't exactly quiet about it afterwards but I still enjoyed the movie-going experience. Many times, I enjoyed the movie.

These days, I still love the movie-going experience. It's just that…well…the movies just don't seem to be what they used to be.

Saying that, I probably sound like one of those crotchety old ladies who sit there and say "things ain't what they used to be." Although, for the record, I never use the word "ain't." Also, while we're on the subject, I will never, ever say, "where you at?" I hear that far too much in person and on the television and, let me tell you, the secret English teacher inside me wants to grab the utterer by the ear and give it a good tweak. That is NOT proper English and no amount of repeating it will make it so.

I digress. What I'm saying about movies is, well, that…mostly these days, they seem to suck. I find that I'm rewatching old favourites because most of the newer ones I've watched just aren't…good.

I know it's not just me. My family and friends are all finding the same thing. These days, if someone asks me if a film is good or not, most of the time the highest praise I can give it is, "it didn't completely suck."

There are some exceptions. I enjoyed "Inception," this summer. It was interesting. I think I liked it even though it's the type of movie that makes you feel like you have a perpetual expression of "Huh?" on your face. My inner 'geek' enjoyed "Scott Pilgrim vs. The World." But I couldn't say it was actually good. Aside from that, well, I can say that there hasn't been a movie in a while that has captured me and made me want to rewatch it again and again. Thinking back, the last movie that completely enchanted me was "Across the Universe," which I still contest was brilliant in its creativity, casting and level of enjoyability.

Yet…I haven't seen anything remotely that entertaining in quite a while, not at the multiplex and not on DVD. Well, not new on DVD anyway.

I just don't feel like they're making good movies anymore. Most of the time what Hollywood thinks is good is not what we, the paying moviegoers, think is good. The top grossing film of the year/summer was "Toy Story 3." I have no doubt it was good. I liked the other Toy Story movies but when it came out, I didn't feel like sitting in a theatre filled with kids and I never did find a time to go. That's my fault. I know. However, not everyone likes animated movies so even if that is the best movie to come along in a while, try convincing someone who doesn't like 'cartoons' that it's worth a watch.

Yet the other top ten movies of the year include "Twilight Saga: Eclipse" which has a built in audience and given the base material, stand little chance of actually being good. It also includes "Iron Man 2" which I admit, I enjoyed but it lacked the comedy and humanity of the first movie.

For the most part, when I see a film these days I feel like there's always a 'but'. As in, "it was a good film…but…"

It may be just me but I think when Hollywood has resorted to either remaking "classics," like "The Karate Kid," or Americanizing foreign movies that really didn't need it ("Let the Right One in" and "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo") or, gasp, making movies based on board games: "Battleship," "Candy Land," and a variety of other Hasbro-themed upcomers- I don't think it is just me.

I will say, however, that of all the 'board game' movies, I wouldn't be surprised if "Battleship," at least, is decent. It's going to be directed by Peter Berg who is the creator behind the fabulous TV show, Friday Night Lights. I think that has to be one of the best shows on TV. It's one of the most poignant and realistic ones too. He manages to take a one minute scene and do more in that than most do in ten minutes.

TV, in my opinion, is the new 'Hollywood.' That's where the creative minds are, the storytelling, acting, direction and all the other nuances that go into making a TV show something to which it's worth committing. While there are duds, there are actually good shows, shows you can talk about with people the next day and spend a while discussing. I think with the economy being what it is, people are staying home to watch their large 'small' screens because they can't afford to see it on the movie screen. The smart people in Hollywood know this. They're the ones looking for the next TV phenomenon. The non-smart people in Hollywood are making movies like "Knight and Day," and "MacGruber."

I guess the point of this blog is that I feel like Hollywood has stopped seeking greatness and has embraced mediocrity. Even the Oscars this year…I thought "The Hurt Locker," was a good film but it wasn't the type of movie you want to put in your DVD collection and watch on rainy days the way you might do with "The Godfather," "American Beauty," or even "Forrest Gump." It wasn't a mediocre movie by any standards but it also wasn't Hollywood.

I'm hoping that Hollywood starts to get better. I'd love to be able to describe a movie as "awesome" again. I'd even settle for, "it was good!

Instead, we simply have, "It was ok." "It was watchable." "It didn't completely suck."

High praise indeed.

Happy Thursday!

Snow, Writing and Other More Lyrical Musings Than I Had in Mind When I Sat Down to Write This

So, I told you yesterday it was snowing. It made me very happy. Happier still was the me that got to drive home in the twirling, whirling cascading snow that threatened to settle but never did. By the time I got to my apartment, it was snowing quite hard.

I've been waiting for it to snow since last year when I stood out on my parent's deck on Christmas Night, looked up at the snow and told myself that I had to come back to the Midwest. I missed snow. I missed my parents. I missed my brothers and sisters. I missed my nieces and nephews. I felt like it was time to come back.

When I left Indiana to move to L.A., I had a dream of being a screenwriter. I think almost any writer who does move to L.A. has the same dream. It wasn't an easy path to take but I tried anyway. I didn't get very far in my quest. I learned to write dialogue by writing screenplays. I entered contests. I got an agent to request a script but I didn't get further than that. And then, one day, I got stuck on an ending to a script. It wasn't working and I needed to rewrite it. I brainstormed how to do it, thought of everything and nothing worked.

So I decided to try writing a novel. I'd just read Stephen King's fantastic book, On Writing, and he made me think I could write a novel. So I tried it. And it was good. You know in movies where the hero or heroine has a sudden ephiphany and you hear the "Hallelujah!" chorus to signify the magnitude of the moment? That's how I felt when I sat down to write a novel. I could hear the Hallelujah chorus in my head. It was like a rush of air, a feeling of warmth slowly flooding through me. I always compare screenplays and novels to lying in a bed. A screenplay is like lying in a small twin bed in which you have a limited space. You have to show a story and convey it in dialogue tightly, concisely with nothing extraneous. And then, with a novel, it's like moving up to a king size bed. You can spread out, take your time to explain things, describe things, the dialogue has to be good but it doesn't have to be rushed. For me, it was almost like coming home.

And so, I wrote a novel. Then another one. Then three more in the series. After that, I took a break but I heard Green Day's "American Idiot" album and I needed to write again. I took that album and I let it guide me through a story, not stealing from the album but, rather, letting it weave through my story like a silent, invisible spiderweb. After that, I wrote a few query letters but nothing happened. I buried my disappointment in another novel, one that was supposed to be light and fluffy but ended up being somewhat dark and twisty. I took another break and wrote short stories but again, got disillusioned by rejection, becoming slightly bitter.

I wrote another novel. This one darker and drier than the other fare. I have a dry sense of humour. It tends to show through in my writing. You might have noticed that.

And that's where I am now. Eight novels under my belt during a seven-year stint in L.A. That's not a bad effort but it's also a good place to stop and wonder if I had to live there. And I realized I didn't. I could live anywhere.

So I moved. I'm back in a place where it rains and snows. Where the trees turn beautiful colours in the Autumn. When the dark, cold days of January and February bleach the world of all colour and show a landscape of barren nothingness, often coated with ice or rain. But it's also a place where, in March, a few balmy spring days let the crocuses and daffodils that have shyly and bravely pushed their stalks up into the cold frozen ground suddenly decide that it's time to bloom. And so the world begins to change into a spring landscape; the ice and snow melt, the flattened soggy ground begins to dry and spring hits, full force.

Last night, I stood on my balcony, my hands wrapped around a mug of Williams Sonoma Peppermint Hot Chocolate (SO worth the splurge) and let the snow fall on me. Snow is peaceful to me. There is nothing more tranquil than looking out onto a world covered in freshly fallen snow, sounds are muffled, the light is brighter in reflection. Seeing the snowflakes fall eased the back-of-my-mind worries that I'd done the right thing in leaving the friends I'd made in L.A., the life I'd carved out for myself. I miss them a lot. I miss my routines, the restaurants, the movies, USC football...everything that defined my life there. But standing there, watching the snow, calmed those worries and eased the last of my doubt.

This morning, I got up and found that the sun was shining but the telltale signs of the snowfall were still around, encrusted onto my windshield, patches of unmelted flakes clustered in the shadows. I woke up to a song on the radio that actually inspired my first novel, a song that fills me with the remembered passion I felt while having that epiphany that this was it. This was what I was supposed to do. And now, with the first snowfall of the season melting away, it's time to begin again. To write again. To stop looking at the things I left and look at the life I have now, car wrecks, speeding tickets included.

It's supposed to snow again on Thursday. I hope it does. I love this time of year. I heard that it's in the '80's in L.A. I like this weather better.

Ask me again in February though. I never said I couldn't be fickle.

Happy Tuesday.