You Can't Please Two Dogs At Once...

I got out on the right side of bed today. I just thought I’d share since I was so grumpy yesterday.

It was actually hard to get up. It was very cool outside last night and I slept with the windows open, a fan blowing the air into the room. I find there’s no sleep better than that with fresh air, while I’m curled up under my covers. It helps even more if you have a cuddly dachshund who likes to crawl under the covers and tuck herself under your arm. Of course, this does lead to all sorts of complications because the other dachshund gets jealous. In this case, it was Rory who was jealous. This meant that when I finally woke up this morning and opened my eyes, Rory was sitting far enough away to indicate she did NOT want to cuddle and she was glaring at me. It may seem odd that a dog could glare but, trust me, they certainly can. When Rory is mad or sad, her ears flatten and she looks very, very dejected or she glares. This morning, she was glaring.

She still hadn’t forgiven me by the time I left for work. I can tell when she’s mad because she makes a point of rudely ignoring me even when I’m attempting to pet her.

Meanwhile, Sookie smugly sat nearby, knowing that she was in favour.

I find the politics of my dogs rather amusing. They love each other but there are times when you can’t actually tell. It’s actually quite peculiar. Sometimes, they fight and play so roughly I’m worried they’ll hurt each other but, moments later, they’re laying peacefully, side by side, resting.

One of their favourite games is “Torment The Beasts Next Door.” This involves tearing up and down the fence line several times while the Dog Whisperer’s beasts try to chase them through the fence. Then, just as Dog Whisperer’s beasts are in a complete frenzy…Rory and Sookie dart away and hide behind the tool shed. Meanwhile, the beasts next door turn on one another, sniping because they’re so wound up they take their energy out on one another. It shouldn’t be amusing but it is.

Some nights, when Dog Whisperer’s dogs aren’t outside, I watch Sookie and Rory run around and around the garden. Last night, Rory was not in the mood to run whereas Sookie was. I watched my peculiar pup run with delight around and around and around the shed. When she was finally done, she decided to go chew on Rory.

The odd thing is that Rory doesn’t seem to mind being chewed. There are often nights where Rory sits happily chomping on one of her chew bones while Sookie sits astride her back, chewing on her ears. There’s no damage done except for a bit of slobber but it still surprises me when it happens before Rory just takes it in stride, placidly ignoring the chewing. Sookie soon gets bored and finds something else to do. It’s just as though Rory is tolerating her annoying sibling’s behavior and deliberately doesn’t react because she knows that eventually Sookie will stop because she’s not getting a reaction. Rory is a smart dog so I wouldn’t be surprised if that was her strategy.

Rory has some fun habits of her own. She likes to jump in the air, completely leaving the ground. This isn’t any hopping…this is full on leaping into the air as though she’s on an invisible doggie trampoline. Her new favourite leaping routine is to run up to me and then leap up by my knees. She loves it when I catch her and scoop her up. She’s got to the point where this is now expected and we have certain cues at which point I know she wants me to catch her as she jumps. The main cue is whenever I go into my bedroom and take my shoes off for some reason. This is Rory’s cue to eagerly leap, all paws off the ground and my cue to catch her under her belly and scoop her up. It took a little practice but we have the routine down now.

Sookie, meanwhile, stares at me with her Very Serious expression. She does not like to jump but she does like to be picked up and cuddled so I must make sure that I play “Scoop up the Leaping Rory,” I must quickly follow it by “Pick up the Serious Sookie.”

Another habit of Rory’s that both endearing and slightly irksome is that she despises it when I’m at the computer. For example, right now as I sat down to blog, she cast me a disgusted look and then slunk off outside. She will continue to sulk outside. Periodically, she’ll come inside and see if I’m still at the computer. If I am, the whole routine begins again. Usually, I end up having to go coax her inside and showing her I’m done with the computer.

For a while, I did think the problem was not so much me being at the computer but, rather, more the chair I was sitting in when I typed. My chairs, you see, are not very heavy. Sometimes, I hang things like my coat over the back. Occasionally, when I take my coat off the back of the chair, the chair tips over. This has happened more than once and it scares Rory whenever it happens. Thus, she doesn’t like my chairs.

However, one night when I took my laptop and sat on the sofa, Rory did the same thing: Gave me a dirty look and ran outside. Meanwhile, Sookie just ignores it. She likes to sit near me while I’m typing. Actually, she prefers to sit on me but that makes it hard to type.

If she does sit on my lap, I thus have to contend with a jealous Rory. She’ll come in from one of her sulks, see Sookie on my lap while I’m working on the hated computer and, well, let’s just say it takes more than a little coaxing for her to forgive me.

I know, I know…I write about my dogs a lot. I also spoil my dogs too much. Some would say I’m exaggerating to say that dogs have moods and that I’m anthropomorphize them too much. However, it’s very hard not to because, well, there’s no mistaking it…my dogs do have moods and they do act decidedly human at times.

I mean, I began my day with a sulky Rory and a cuddly Sookie. At present, I have…a sulky Rory and a happy Sookie because she’s sitting by my feet while Rory is outside, currently yipping her “COME OUT HERE” yip because…she’s bored and wants attention.

One thing I’ll say is that I’m never bored when my two girls are around.

Happy Thursday!

Wrong Side of Bed Days

Today was one of those days where I woke up in a bad mood and it didn’t get better. As a child on days like this, my mother would say I got out on the wrong side of a bed. I was a bit literal as a child and would be a bit baffled by this because for many years, my bed was against a wall and thus there was only one side on which I could exit but, as I got older, I realized it wasn’t a literal phrase.

Still, I do try to get out on the same side of the bed every day anyway. This isn’t always easy when the pups are splayed out and I have to climb over them. Since Sookie has taken to sleeping on my legs, this is rather difficult.

Nevertheless, I do feel like I got out of bed on the wrong side. I’ve just felt crabby all day. Work isn’t going fabulously lately. I feel like I’m doing a lot of work but nothing is happening and I’m stuck in a rut. I’m hoping it’s just a phase again and that things will pick up but I do prefer it when I have a lot of things happening.

The problem with work is that even when I don’t mind going, it ends up being the recipient of my bad mood. This is the problem with spending 8+ hours a day in the same place. Even when it’s not work causing the bad mood, I take the bad mood with me.

Still, for a bad moody kind of day, it went pretty quickly. I don’t feel like I got anything accomplished but that’s because it was one of those days where I had a lot going on but nothing to show for it at the end of the day.

On the plus side, it’s a beautiful evening. The sun is shining and the humidity is low. Since it’s July, days like this will become rarer so I am taking the time to appreciate it while I can. This includes mowing the lawn which is a necessary evil. I’m sure I’ll get to relax outside afterwards but, for now, lawn mowing has become less of the bane of my existence and, instead, I actually quite like it. I find it relaxing. Well, I should say, I mostly find it relaxing. It’s not so relaxing when there are three beasts in Dog Whisperer’s yard trying to yap themselves to death as I mow but, generally speaking, I’ve found that if I yell at them, Dog Whisperer comes out, throws me a dirty look and brings them inside. I’m not fond of having to yell, honestly. I’d prefer that Dog Whisperer actually noticed that his dogs were close to apoplexy in their loud, shrill annoying barking but, alas, he rarely does. If I yell, I think he hears that, especially as it’s generally, “SHUT UP!” I don’t think he likes me shouting at his beasts but someone has to do it, I think.

I’m finding that in addition to the fact that the dogs are rather annoying with their frantic barking, my dogs are often blamed as being the noisy dogs. This is because I walk the girls every day and I get out and about. People like to stop and greet us and several times, I’ve had comments such as “Are these the ones that like to make all the noise?”

I have to politely explain that while Rory and Sookie do have a yip on occasion, they are not constantly yipping at everything that moves. I don’t like them getting blamed unfairly. I do confess that lately, Rory has been quite…vocal…outside but it’s by far a different type of vocal that the cacophony of demented barking that comes from next door.

Rory’s barking is more of a summons. When Sookie and I sit down in the evenings or if I’m blogging and on the computer, Rory has taken to going and sitting outside the back door on the grass. Then, without fail, she sends up a couple of barks. Her bark isn’t a woof…it’s more an indignant cry. It seriously sounds like she’s yipping: “Come out here! I’m bored!” And she keeps making the sound until either I or Sookie goes out to see her. Usually it’s me. Rory proceeds to get excited to see me and follows me back inside. If I dare start emailing or blogging, the whole process starts over. Only am I ready to sit down and watch her play with her toys, perhaps joining in, does she settle down.

Yes, my dogs are needy. I probably shouldn’t indulge them but I do. I have to admit that I quite enjoy it. They have personalities and that makes life more fun.

Also, they somehow manage to drive the bad moods right out of me when I get home from work and there’s a lot to be said for that.

If only I could take them to work.

Happy Wednesday and thanks for reading!

Another Rainy Monday

Oh, but it’s a gloomy day out there today.

The sun tried to peek out once around lunch time but before that and after that, the skies have been grey and it’s done little but pour with rain or threaten to pour with rain.

We’ve had so much rain lately that even I’m fed up with it. I usually love the rain. After all, it’s one of the reasons I wanted to move back from L.A. Ironically, it’s quite depressing to have sun all the time and to know without absolute certainty that even though it’s a little cloudy in the months from May-September that it’s not going to rain and, if it does, it’ll be a few raindrops that are just enough to make the dusty cars look terrible. I got fed up with sunshine all the time. I know, I know- readers who are in the wet and soggy Midwest (including my mother) will laugh and say I was crazy. However, try it sometime. It’s like getting to eat your favourite food for every single meal, whenever you like. Eventually, it stops being your favourite meal and you yearn for something different.

This may explain why I’m tired of the rain. For the past two weeks, we’ve had five days of rain to every two that are sunny. It’d be nice if that flipped and we’d have two days of rain and five days that are dry.

Still, as the saying goes, into every life a little rain may fall. In our case, it’s been quite a lot of rain but, well, it makes the grass green, the seeds grow and all that. It also makes my garden a soggy mess and depresses my dogs.

It’s hard to have depressed dogs. They sit around and mope. They sigh a lot. They enter a drowsy state of ennui. It’s actually not a little unlike my mother when it’s been rainy or snowy for a while (sorry, Mum!).

The worst thing is- and my mother does not do this- is that both Sookie and Rory seem to hold me personally responsible for the fact that their outdoor playground has become a mass of soggy muddy puddles and every time they go out, this wet stuff falls from the sky and soaks them.

It’s hard to explain to a pair of dachshunds that I do not control the weather. It’s actually quite hard to explain anything to a pair of dachshunds for any length of time. Rory tries to understand. She looks at me with alert eyes and does that adorable little head cock that dogs do when they recognize a word. In Rory’s case, her favourite word is “treat”. Her second favourite is “dinner.” This would explain why, when I took the girls to the vet on Friday for their annual check up and injections, I discovered that not only was Rory a whole pound heavier than Sookie but if she gets much heavier, I have to put her on a diet.

Rory used to be the smaller of the two dogs. Methinks that her preference for doggie ‘junk’ food over nutritious doggy food is not a good thing. Methinks I have to limit her snacks even more than I already am.

Anyway, back to the rain. The dogs are fed up with the rain. Rory does attempt to stay active. She often runs around and has a good chomp on a toy. Meanwhile, Sookie goes into a state of malaise where she lies on the sofa and refuses to move. She prefers to sit on my lap. I prefer her to sit on my lap except for times when she’s ventured into the rain out of necessity and returns, wet and muddy. These, of course, are the times that Sookie prefers to sit on my lap because it’s warmer.

When it does stop raining and both dogs deign to go outside, they immediately go to the infamous sewer grate. After the rain, there are fun happenings there- there is the sound of water streaming many feet below us and, even more exciting, there is a pipe that is cascading water down from the surface level to the stream below. The dogs find this absolutely fascinating. They find it so fascinating that whenever we go on a walk, Rory must investigate all the sewer drains to see if they, too, are doing interesting things.

I’m a bit tired of sewer drains. Fortunately, if I provide the pebbles, Rory has figured out how to drop them into the drain herself now. It’s weird but I figure it means she’s not Up To No Good. I’m sure the sewer department would disagree but, hey, they haven’t had to chase her after she’s got out of the worlds’ smallest hole in the fence.

It looks like both tonight and tomorrow will continue to be wet so there won’t be much sewer drain activity or any outdoor activity of any kind until at least Wednesday.

It just means that I’ll have a couple of sulky dogs on my hands. I’d like to make them understand that I can’t control the rain but, well, even if I did, they’d still blame me.

They are dachshunds after all.
Happy Tuesday!

Happy "Puppiversary" to Us!

I did not dream of zombies last night. I was actually quite pleased about this although I did have rather a detailed dream about work which I’m not sure if it was much of an improvement. If I’d have still been at my old job, I could have argued that it was actually still about zombies due to the rather uninspired atmosphere at that place.

The rain has stopped. It’s now snowing. I sometimes forget that the seasons are a little schizophrenic in the Midwest and that even though it’s 60 degrees one day, the next it can be 30 degrees and snowy. I don’t know how I actually forget this but I do.

It definitely keeps things interesting, at least. You never quite know what the weather will do next. I still make the mistake of listening to Mr. Weatherman in the mornings but that doesn’t exactly help. He’s wrong at least 50% of the time.

Even with the rather varied weather we’ve had, this week has actually gone quite quickly. I can’t actually believe it’s Friday tomorrow which is a bit of an usual thing. I’m definitely not complaining that it’s Friday tomorrow. I’m a big fan of Fridays. I like Fridays as much as I dislike Mondays.

This Friday- tomorrow- is actually a significant Friday for me. It marks that day that, one year ago, I picked up a little puppy named Sookie and took her home. On Saturday, it’s the anniversary of the day that I went and picked up her sister, Rory, because it seemed so cruel to separate them. Also, Rory’s big, sweet eyes that seemed to say, “Pick Me! Choose Me!” when I got to choose between her and Sookie made me feel guilty because I didn’t pick her at first.

I remember being a little nervous as my mother and I went to Walmart to get some supplies for Sookie when she came home. When we went to get Sookie, it was a little unnerving to go down the muddy, unfinished driveway of the house where she lived and discover that she was living at an unofficial ‘dog shelter.’ There was a pack of scary dogs that roamed loose on the property of the old farmhouse and who chased my car down the drive, trying to bite my tires. I remember being nervous as I got out the car in case the dogs were vicious but they weren’t…they were just unruly. Then, when I went inside, I discovered that not only was there a Sookie but she had a sister and I got to choose which one I took home. I picked Sookie because she came to me and let me pick her up whereas Rory was easily distracted by the Maltese puppy in the room. At the time, I knew I was going to feel bad about separating the pair which was evidenced by my calling later that night after Sookie was home to find out if Rory was still there. She was but she’d been promised to someone else.

I was sad but Sookie and my first night together was nice enough. I had a writer’s conference the next day and I hated leaving my new puppy with her ‘grandparents’ but I’d already made the commitment to a friend that I’d go with her to the conference. While the conference was a bit of a waste of time, I got a phone call in the middle of a session that made it worthwhile: Rory’s new owners didn’t show up to pick her up and, if I was still interested, she could be mine.

I needed no further enticement. Back to the scary, dog-infested farmhouse I went and Rory came home with me. Now I can’t imagine every just having one puppy.

Now, one year later, they’re not really puppies anymore even though I still think of them as such. I can’t believe that I was worried about the responsibility of having a dog. I remember that even though I was excited about getting a puppy, I was also afraid that it would not only tie me down but that I would be a horrible pet parent.

I’ve found that one year later, I don’t feel tied down at all. Instead, I have these lovely, furry, snuggly additions to my life that have just become…part of my life. They’re as part of me and my daily routine as eating and drinking are. I wake up with at least one of them under the covers, head snuggled under my chin every day. I go home at lunch each day to let them out and, each time, when I come home from somewhere…anywhere, there they are, tails wagging, jumping up and down as if to say, “Where have you BEEN? We MISSED you!”

It’s nice to be missed and to come home to see those bright eyes and wagging tails. Even on the worst of days, having a dog to lick you on the nose and sit on your lap makes everything better.

My fear about being a horrible pet parent seems to have been a little paranoid. Since they’re both healthy, seemingly happy and alive after a year, I must have done something right.

Also, they seem to really like me so I figure that’s a good sign.

I feel like I should do something this weekend to celebrate our ‘puppiversary’. Maybe we’ll go for a long walk over the woods to check out the floods. Last time we went, it was pretty bad but with all the rain we’ve had, I’m sure it’s going to be worse now. Of course, they won’t know what we’re celebrating but I don’t suppose that matters. A walk will make us all happy and give us time to spend together and, honestly, what better way to celebrate is that?

Happy Friday and have a great weekend!

Lovely Lazy Weekends

It's been a very grey sort of weekend. The sun peeked out for a few moments today but, aside from that, it's been grey and rather angry looking out there. We were supposed to have some snow on Saturday but although we had a heavy snow shower, it ended up alternating between rain, snow and greyness. In the end, the tiny bit of snow we had melted and it turned into a mushy world outside.

I'm not complaining though. I took advantage of the greyness and decided to have a very lazy and relaxing weekend. Even though I did useful things like laundry, grocery shopping and cleaning, I also made sure to watch some dvd's, do a jigsaw and generally just take advantage of the fact that I didn't have to do anything.

It's been a while since I had a weekend like this. During the summer, it's harder because I feel like I should be outside doing something productive. In the autumn, there's still enough warm days that I try to take advantage of them by being outside. When spring rolls around and the weather gets a little warmer, I tend to feel like I should get outside and get some fresh air because the winter makes us feel cooped up.

Thus, winter is the only season where it's mostly acceptable to pass a day with the TV on, a puppy in your lap and a jigsaw in front of you. Certainly, there are more productive things that I could be doing but there's nothing pressing. Granted, I probably should be taking advantage of being inside by writing but between books, I like to have a hiatus to recharge my creativity and mind and I'm still on that hiatus after finishing "Emmy Goes to Hell." I'll probably pick up with a new novel in a couple of weeks but, for now, I'm allowing myself a mental vacation. These are necessary, I think. They help avoid writers' block. They help make sure that the new book is 'fresh' and not writing on the waves of the one I just finished. Also, they help my brain just get back to a place where it's open to all new ideas.

So, I didn't write. I simply enjoyed the greyness of the day by being inside, warm and cosy in my house. I cooked because what's relaxation without a little cooking? I made soups- butternut squash on Saturday and the Olive Garden's zuppa toscana recipe for dinner tonight. For me, soups are my very favourite comfort food. Thus, having a comfortable weekend requires soup.

The only problem I'm having is that the dogs seem to be feeling cooped up. I did walk them even though it's been cold but Rory especially seems...bored. Sookie will curl up the sofa to sleep but Rory will sit on the floor, watching us. Then she'll start barking to let me know I should be paying attention. Or, she'll bark at Sookie because she wants her to play. I've been playing a lot more with her but it still doesn't stop her from sitting on the floor and sighing. It's a little...perplexing. She and Sookie still go outside and play but the garden seems to lack the excitement it usually does. They don't seem interested in their usual activities of hole digging, bird/squirrel/bunny hunting and chasing or their favourite game of tearing around the garden running after one another and then rolling around in the grass.

Since they're both eating and playing at times, I know nothing is physically wrong. I can only assume that they're feeling a little trapped by the greyness of winter. There's no snow to burrow under, only soggy flat grass which makes their paws wet, muddy and cold. The squirrels aren't out much. The bunny is mostly hibernating. They still chase birds but they fly away and then they're bored again.

The problem is...they're dogs. They're not like little children with cabin fever who you can take out to a movie or the mall or the circus or something. You can't sit down with a dachshund and do crafts to engage their minds- they'd just eat the paper and glue and be done with it. I play tug of war and "hide the squeaky" toy but this does not last long.

Thus, I think we'll just have to find activities. I'm making sure to take them on walks so they're at least getting exercise and I don't feel like they're sleeping the day away. I just wish, sometimes, they could talk and they could tell me what they wanted to do.

Ah well, half the fun is trying to figure it out. I tried to show Sookie my jigsaw but she tried to eat the pieces. Rory is having quite a lot of fun attempting to sit on my head whenever I sit on the sofa. She jumps up and sits on the back of it and then, lo and behold, I'm wearing a dachshund hat.

Still, in a few weeks, spring will be nearer and the days will be longer, the ground will dry out a little and outside will be filled with the first signs of spring. I'm sure this will bring new bunnies, squirrels and birds for them to hunt and chase.

In the meantime, it's still winter and I'm planning on taking advantage of the comfort of having to stay indoors.

Now, if I can just convince the pups of that. I'll keep working on it.

Happy Monday!

Attack of Crocodog!

Have you ever noticed how when you plan a relaxing weekend, the opposite usually happens?

Case in point- I took Friday off because I had a doctor's appointment so I thought I'd just treat myself to the rest of the day off to relax, possibly see a movie and just enjoy the fact that I didn't have to work.

Naturally, that's when the brakes on my car decided to make a rather scary, grinding sound that sounded like I had some angry creature living under my car whenever I braked.

Thus, my Friday was spent partially at the doctors and partially sitting, patiently, waiting for my brakes to be fixed. This was not what I had in mind when I decided to take the day off.

So, I thought, I'd make up for it on Saturday. I'd sleep in, be lazy and just run menial errands that didn't take up much time. I might even see a movie.

Unfortunately, the sleeping in part didn't happen. You see, I have puppies.

One of my puppies- Sookie Sue Stackhouse- is a sweet little dog that likes to sleep. She can be stubborn and moody but mostly, she's very sweet and often cuddly which is why I sometimes call her 'teddy bear dog.'

And then there's Rory Wrigglebottom Gilmore. She's also a sweet dog. She's a tad naughty, a little jealous but extremely loving. She's also, uh, very active.

On Saturday morning, I woke up at 5 a.m. Rory was wriggling a little so I thought I'd be clever. You see, we get up on weekdays around 6:03 a.m. The puppies are used to this so, even on weekends, their little bladders decide they need to go out no later than 6:03 a.m. On this particular Saturday, waking up at 5 a.m., I thought, "hey- if I let the puppies outside now, then we can come back to bed and sleep in."

This ploy has worked before. Not this Saturday, however. The puppies did go out at 5 am. They came in at 5:10 a.m. We went back to bed. Sookie snuggled next to me and promptly tried to sleep.

Rory did not. She began to do what she does best- and honoured her name- she began to wriggle.

In her defense, she tried to sleep. She laid down. Then she moved to get comfortable elsewhere on the bed. You could almost hear her sighing as she attempted to be still. Then she wriggled.

Needless to say, by 6 a.m. She had given up on sleep. She had decided that biting my toes might be preferable.

I tried to calm her down but, alas, this did not happen. I got up and got her a chew stick. She chewed it and then got bored.

You might wonder why I didn't put her on the floor. Well, I did, eventually. She went into the living room and began to play with her loudest squeaky toy. Meanwhile, Sookie and are are trying to sleep. It was about 6:20 a.m. by this time.

I managed to doze off. I think Sookie did too. Then, without warning, I felt this enormous weight on my head and it was quite wet. Somehow, Rory had jumped up on my rather high bed. She'd never done this before. She was sitting on my head, licking me. As soon as I opened my eyes, she began to try to bite my ears. Sookie grumbled. I did too.

Rory tried to sleep again. I was quite pleased with her. That, however, lasted about five minutes. Rory discovered a new game then. I call it Crocodog.

What is crocodog, you might ask? Well, it's when Rory gets under the covers and they mound up over her and she slowly moves across the bed when, suddenly, she's underneath her sister and you hear an "UNK!"

It's not like unlike a crocodile, moving slowly across a swamp, only the mound of its back visible, sneaking up on its prey and then...SNAP!

Hence the name crocodog.

Rory "unk"ed Sookie. Then she tried to "Unk" me. She then proceeded to go after my toes again. That hurt.

Needless to say, while I was tired and wanting to sleep, I was also laughing. Rory makes for an amusing Crocodog and while I wanted to be cross with her, when she finally emerged from the covers, her face resting only inches from mine, looking at me with those big brown eyes, I couldn't be angry.

I ended up getting up and having an early start to the day.

The rest of the weekend wasn't so bad. It just wasn't as relaxing as I'd hoped. I think my problem is that I have so many friends and coworkers who are going on these exotic vacations that I'm a little envious. Even when the vacations aren't so exotic, I'm a little envious. I'd love to just get away but, alas, being a new homeowner/puppy owner means that I can't really afford it and I don't have the time anyway.

Still, in the end, I was allowed to sleep in on Sunday which made things better. I think Rory might have been a little tired. After all, I did keep waking her up on Saturday night when she tried to sleep with a squeaky toy. Yes, it was a little mean but it was fun. Also, it meant we slept in until 9 a.m. without enduring a Crocodog attack.

Sometimes you just have to do...what you have to do.

Happy Monday!

Puppies and Mondays...

It was, as expected, a rainy, dreary Monday today. The sun didn't come out once and the skies threatened drizzle all day. It didn't drizzle much but it was enough to make it a soggy day, nonetheless.

Still, as Mondays always do, it passed. Work was pretty uneventful which is not a bad thing at all other than the fact that I continue to experience a little ennui and tell Time Buddy rather more than it really wants to know.

The funny thing is that I think, a few months ago, I would have been in a different place, mentally. I probably would be complaining that, once again, I got bumped off a project I really wanted to be a part of in favour of my coworker being put on the project instead. This now means that since I joined my company, I've now been a part of...zero project teams. Not a one. The ones I've been on, I've been bumped off and I don't really know why. Well, I do- it's office politics.

In addition, my boss continues to ignore me and I'm working on the same thing day after day. It's nothing I have complained about in other blogs.

Yet, the interesting thing is that even though it bothers me while I'm at work, for the most part, the minute I leave the office, it fades from my mind and I don't even care.

I've been moving towards that place for a while. I think it's the puppies that pushed me over the edge, though. I was resistant about getting a dog because of the responsibility. I didn't want to be tied down; I wanted to be able to do what I wanted, when I wanted.

Then, somehow, thanks to my friend Ms. P, I started really thinking about getting a dog. So, I ended up with Rory and Sookie. Even though I do find that I have far less freedom, the interesting fact is that I don't care. I think, perhaps, I know, just a little, what it's like to be a parent. It's not nearly as bad. After all, if a parent put their child in a crate for four-hour time periods and let him/her out at lunch for just a little while, they'd probably get in serious trouble. I, however, can crate the puppies with no guilt because they really don't seem to mind and all of the books say it's a ok.

But still, I find myself missing my puppies whenever I leave them for any length of time. Even when I've had a miserable day in the office, I come home and their silly, adorable little faces stare up at me, not knowing or caring about where I've been, just that I'm home. I love that when I let them out of their crate and Sookie has done her business, she wants to come up on my lap and lick me and give me 'kisses' and sit with me. Then, Rory will try to join in and they'll start to bicker. It's a nice routine, even if it doesn't sound like it.

I'm no longer the footloose and fancy-free Monkeypants who can hop a plane to L.A. to visit friends when she has the time and resources, I don't mind. It's peculiar how natural it feels to think of the puppies before I plan anything. My routine has changed. We go to bed early and get up early. Even though I've never been a late sleeper, my earlier weekend hours mean that I can get out and about before places get crowded and then come home to spend the rest of the time with the puppies.

Of course, just like with kids, the puppies can be trying. Rory has figured out how to push open doors that don't latch right. One of them is my bedroom. If I turn my back for any length of time, Rory has led Sookie into the room and they've found my shoes. My new Crocs have a little imprint of Rory's teeth in them already. They also like the laundry basket and take pleasure in scattering my clothes across the room.

Tonight, I took a shower, leaving the door ajar to let them know I was in there. They tend to get upset if they think I've left them. I left my underwear, theoretically, out of reach and yet when I got out the shower, there was no underwear. It was in the living room.

Rory, obviously the troublemaker of the pair, has also figure out how to jump up onto the sofa. Sookie still can't do it. This means that even when I try to keep them down, Rory will take a flying leap and suddenly be right there. This leads to Sookie looking as though she's been spanked, a sorrowful pair of eyes staring up at me, hurt that I let Rory up and not her. So I lift Sookie up and then, Rory gets upset now Sookie is violating her space. Bickering ensues that ends up with wrestling and lots of groaning and moaning at one another.

Sookie is very good at looking sorrowful. She has a way of making me feel guilty even though I haven't, to my knowledge, done anything wrong. That's a dangerous gift she has. Rory, on the other hand, is quite vocal when I've done something wrong- barking and groaning at me so I know I've erred.

Even with all of the 'drama of puppies', I feel...happy. It's nice to have company, nice to have two little personalities who constantly keep me busy. Even though I'm having to adjust my habits and routines to fit theirs, it doesn't matter nearly as much as I thought I would. I've had a couple of rejections from agents/publishers, etc. since I've had them and even though it still stings a little, it doesn't leave me with the gloomy feeling of failure with which it used to leave me.

Of course, every now and again I do, just a little, miss being able to go in here, to my 'office' and blog without interruption. For example, Rory just came and sweetly tried to jump up so I put her on my lap. Then Sookie came in and gave me her reproachful, "hey, what about me?" look.

Now Rory is trying to get into my bedroom, inevitably to hunt down some laundry or shoes.

There's never a dull moment with puppies.

Happy Tuesday!

Fast-Flying Weeks...

It's Thursday tomorrow. Somehow, the midpoint of the week passed by without me really noticing it. It's not even that it's been an eventful week; it's more that the week has just gone by quickly.

It's not been a bad week. My new strategy with the Dog Whisperer- the previous bane of my existence- is...to ignore him. I can hear you say it now, "well, duh, isn't that obvious?" It probably is but not to an overprotective pet parent like me. I used to worry that my girls were disturbing the 'hood, that their cute little yipping was going to drive his dogs to a heart attack.

These days, I'm not so bothered. I leave my back door open. That way, Rory and Sookie can go out if they need to which, 98% of the time, they do. It's great for house-breaking. Unfortunately, 75% of the time, the puppies go out, the Dog Whisperer lets his beasts out.

As you've read...I used to care. Now, I don't. Unless I can hear Rory or Sookie yapping or causing mayhem, I tend to let them run. When I look out, it seems like my puppies are running up and down the fence on our side, tormenting the Dog Whisperer's beasts. Those beasts continue to bark loudly. My girls are quiet; they're just running. The way I now look at it is that if anyone in the neighbourhood is going to complain, they're going to complain about the barking. And whose dogs are barking?

Yup...not mine. Thus, my new strategy is to let my puppies out whenever they want to go. If the Dog Whisperer's beasts are out, so be it. It isn't my fault that they can't control their rat terriers.

I'm also contemplating not building the privacy fence but, instead, doing some landscaping to block out the neighbours. I think it'd be cheaper and, also, I adore landscaping. I'm thinking if I convert some of the lawn that I hate mowing to garden and flower beds, not only can I plant trees and shrubs that block out the Dog Whisperer's house but, also, I get to have fun.

It's all in the pipeline of my mind, right now. I think on it when I have a chance. At work, those chances are rare. I've learned that the best way to deal with my boss is to tell him what I'm going to do, rather than ask him. As a rather bossy, overly control-freak-esque personality, this shouldn't be surprising revelation. However, given the fact that he's usually incapable of making any decision that's more important than where he's going for lunch which, by the way, is sometimes far more difficult than you'd imagine, it's quite a shock that my declaration of what I plan on doing is met with a hiding-the-enthusisam, "ok!"

So, I'm busy at work. When I get a free moment, it's usually around lunch during which time, I pump up the Muse music and try to make it home in as few traffic lights as possible in order to release the puppies from their crate.

I like our lunch hours, even though crating the puppies back up on a beautiful spring day feels a little like I'm a jailer. I'd like to let them run free but I don't quite trust them...not yet. Give them a couple of weeks and...maybe.

This weekend, I plan on spending as much time with the puppies as possible. I also intend to work in the garden. If the Dog Whisperer's dogs are out and yappy, I intend to ignore them.

If not, a coworker lent me this device called 'Dog Trainer' which emits a sound that is really high and really loud and, conveniently, only perceptible to the ear of a dog. I've tried it on the dog who lives on the 'good' neighbour's side. This dog has a tendency to bark. However, two pushes of the button of the 'Dog Trainer' and that little doggie is quiet as a mouse. I'm hoping it doesn't hurt them but, instead, teaches them to be quiet.

If the Dog Whisperer's beasts misbehave, I think I'll give it a go. I don't think that qualifies as animal cruelty...right? I prefert to think it as a "Prevention of Cruelty to Humans" type of device..it controls that which could be rendered cruel to our ears- i.e. Super yappy dogs that don't shut up even when you shout at them.

I think, for now, I'll keep the device in my pocket. If it makes them stop barking...I win. And, if not, perhaps the Dog Whisperer will keep his routine of letting them inside when he gets annoyed with the yapping. Since I don't intend to herd Rory and Sookie inside anymore....I win..again.

I think we call that a win-win situation. Hurrah!

Happy Thursday!

Discipline Issue and Publishing Doubts...

It's over halfway through the week and I don't know about you but I'm exhausted!

It hasn't been a bad week though. Work is slower than it has been for the past couple of weeks but I'm still finding ways to keep myself occupied. The only danger in being less busy is that you notice things that usually prickle in your mind as annoyances during a busy day but, in a more relaxed day, really start to bother you.

Still, what is work when things in life are going so interestingly? While I'm experiencing a slight case of puppy frustration- one of my little girls will NOT listen to me, even when I raise my voice (as the reading materials suggest). Even though I take them out regularly, they still like to 'have accidents' inside. I bought them puppy pads, just so they had somewhere to go that was easy to clean. They've decided they're chew toys instead. Never mind that they have a ton of chew toys scattered around the dog-proofed area. Anything they can sink their teeth into is fair game.

I know, I know, they're puppies. That's part of their charm. It's just hard. Sookie is very willful and stubborn. One of my coworkers was generous enough to give me a 'puppy shower' gift- a magazine all about Dachshunds. There are tips in there for everything including housebreaking. It says that Dachshunds, by nature, are willful and stubborn. I'm seeing that first hand. Yet the problem is I'm trying everything they're suggesting and still Sookie ignores me. Rory is more manageable. She's a sweet soul with a mischievious streak but she does listen and she does know when she's done wrong. Sookie, on the other hand, glares at me when I firmly tell her 'No' and slinks off. I love them both, equally but I'm not sure how to handle the differences in personality. While I'm glad I have them both for the sake of them being able to keep each other company, I also worry that they won't need me so much. That I'm just a third party to their little puppy world.

I think part of it is that they're both a little afraid to go outside, thanks to the beasts that live next door(s). This morning, I was trying to encourage them to relieve themselves so I could go to work and just as I feared, my neighbour let his three noisy dogs out into their yard. Pandemonium ensued. In the darkness of Daylight Savings Time, my girls were terrified. They didn't relieve themselves because they were too worried by the barking. I was angry. While I know my neighbours have every right to let their dogs out, it would be nice if they would be slightly more thoughtful and at least look to see if we're out there. I only put my back yard, outside light on when we're out there. It wouldn't take much to be thoughtful.

But I've lived here since August. Thoughtfulness is not in their reportoire. Before I got the puppies, I'd be out in my yard, working. I could hear the neighbour's dogs bark at me from inside. Clearly, the neighbours got fed up of the barking and so they let them outside. Never mind that I was enjoying my peace. Never mind that they don't control the annoying creatures. They just didn't want to hear the barking.

I think my only solution is to build a privacy fence. I've done the estimates and if I get the materials myself and build it, I can afford it. It should be my responsibility but, in truth, I do want the privacy and so I think it's our only option. I don't expect it to eliminate the problem entirely but at least I'll be able to set foot in my own garden without being besieged by a platoon of yapping dogs.

Puppy/dog woes aside, this is a big week for me. My book is published. It's for sale. I'm now in that stage where I'm wondering if it was the right thing to do. I published because I had a ton of people say they'd buy my book, mostly on Facebook. So far....there's not much follow-through. I know, again, it's a question of the impatience of Captain Monkeypants. I want instant results. People don't give instant results. They'll buy it if and when they're ready. If they don't, well, I gave it a shot. I'm going to try self-promotion next. I have some ideas. I have some support in good friends who either have already bought my book or have pledged to buy it. Other than that, I'm in a scary stage where I've put myself out there. Readers will either like it or politely abstain from giving feedback.

In my heart, I know it's a good read. I won't say it's a good 'book' because, let's face it, I don't intend to win a Pulitzer with it. But I think if people gave it a shot, they might like it. The worst part now is that I'm reliant on those sales, on that feedback. And, as a self-professed control-freak, I'm not sure I like having that reliance.

The thing is, I do now have that reliance and I have to accept it, even if I don't like it. It's part of the writing process, for better or for worse.

And, if it gets to me, I still have two puppies that keep me entertained. For example, I have one of those small animatronic "Fur Real" pets that's a pig. If you press its back, it grunts and snorts and wiggles. The puppies are fascinated and...slightly worried. If an animatronic pig can get their attention, there's hope for me yet.

Happy Thursday!

Commitments: Puppies and Writing....

Today was my Friday, as far as work is concerned. It's nice to have a 'bonus' day off, even if I am using valuable PTO hours.

Still, I think, sometimes, it's ok to squander time off. If we don't, we forget the value of a stolen day, here and there.

For me, tomorrow, I get to pick up my puppy. Tonight is my 'last' night of being a responsibility-free Monkeypants. From here on out, I have a puppy to look after.

I admit, I'm now getting terrified. I'm used to being unattached, able to hop on a plane to L.A., Las Vegas, Washington D.C. when I feel like it. Now, I'm going to have to think about it, make sure I've arranged for puppy-care and consider another being within the equation of my life.

Oh, who am I kidding...it's time. It might not be a husband, it may definitely not be a child but a puppy is a good first step. I've enjoyed my life thus far: I've been able to explore new places, take a running leap into the great unknown and just float in the oblivion of not having any commitments.

Yet there comes a time when maybe it's time to rethink the world I've known. Maybe floating in that oblivion isn't so good when you're my age. Maybe it is time to prove that I can, in fact, commit to something and decide that it's time to settle down, at least with something.

If I can settle with a puppy, it's a good start. It's all about the little things...right?

Puppy aside, I'm glad it's the weekend. I'm going to my very first writing conference this weekend. I'm not even being dragged. A friend and fellow writer asked if I was interested and, when I contemplated for a moment, I decided I was.

For me, this is another milestone. Until now, I've been a little afraid of writer's workshops, conferences and gatherings. I've had a fair amount of 'friendly criticism' that has masqueraded as unhelpful complaining. I've been in a few writer's groups and learned that sometimes, when your ideals are different, there's just no way to get a 'literary' writer to understand that sometimes people just write so people can enjoy what they read. For me, that's always been a slight problem. I'm not condemning literary writers at all. I just think they're a little full-of-it. They get so bogged down with making their work 'mean' something that they forget that a writer's job is to entertain, to lift someone out of their everyday life and make them forget it for a while.

It might be that I'm saying this because I've realized I'll never be a 'literary' writer. I've tried. I end up using flowery phrases, long words, dialogue that means nothing. When I'm done, I feel like I've cheated on myself because I haven't produced anything but an empty story that doesn't feel like it's finished.

Yet, these are often the books that win the awards and the critical acclaim of the press. They're rarely the books that make the bestseller lists but that doesn't seem to matter. Instead, they serve as a way to measure if you're 'literary'. If you haven't read it, well, then, you're not worth much, are you? It won the Pulitzer!

Yet, to be honest, I've read a few of those novels and... they bore me to tears. The one that comes to mind is "The Shipping News". It's by E. Annie Proulx. I read it a few years ago, before the movie with Kevin Spacey came out. I hated it. I felt so stupid when I turned the last page. Here was a novel that had won amazing critical acclaim, had won a Pulitzer, was supposed to be amazing...and I hated it. It was dull. It was boring. The characters were whiny and pathetic. I know they were supposed to be 'gritty' and 'realistic' but in my world, I just despised them. I kept waiting for something exciting to happen. It never did. It was just the story of a sad-sack of a man who managed to find a semblance of a life.

I felt like I was missing something. Truth-be-told, I often feel that way with novels that win acclaim. Take, for example, the novel I just finished reading: The Magicians by Lev Grossman. I'd read several reviews that called it a 'grown up Harry-Potter'.

Well, in truth, it was. It was about a drip of a boy named Quentin who is miserable with the everydayness of his life. He finds his way to a college for magic and he passes the entrance exam with flying colours. He's still miserable. He goes to the college and learns magic, albeit a much less fun and far more scientific version of magic than in, say, Harry Potter. He's still miserable. He finishes magic school and nearly drinks himself to death. He's still miserable. When he finds a way, through a friend, into the fictional world he's always dreamed of entering...he's still miserable.

You get the idea. Halfway through the book, I began to wonder why on earth Quentin was the main character. He was a complete drip. I hated him. I kept waiting for him to have the moment of greatness that revealed the reason why he was the main character. It never happened. His girlfriend ends up saving him and dying in the process. Sadly, she's no more interesting than he is.

So you get where I stand, right? Sometimes the books that become the darlings of the literary world aren't necessarily the books that the public like to read. This is why Stephanie Meyer, Dan Brown and Nicholas Sparks have fan clubs.

As much as I hate to want to join their ranks, I have to admit, I'd rather be a Stephen King or Stephanie Meyer than an E. Annie Proulx or a Lev Grossman. Yes their books might win accolades but they're not going to be popular with readers because they're boring.

So, as I approach the writer's conference this weekend, I admit I do so with apprehension. I'm not used to being around fellow writers. I'm used to being a lone wolf, arrogant in my ability to remain apart from the pack.

Really, though, I think my loneness comes from fear. What if the pack hates me, thinks I'm a hack and laughs me out of the room? I used to worry about that.

These days, I'm not so worried. The fact is, I write. I write a lot. It's not such a bad thing to find others that do so. Maybe it's good to have a 'pack.'

I'm willing to give it a go at least. It's a commitment of another sort. At least this one can't necessarily pee on my floor or bite me. It's probably not as cute either, though. It's a toss up, isn't it?

It's almost puppy-time. Wish me luck!

Thanks, as always, for reading.

Happy Friday!

A Harry Potter Day....

Today is a Harry Potter day. I say this because today's the day that Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince movie comes out. I'm quite excited and yes, I am taking time from my moving schedule to see it.

I like Harry Potter Days. The best days are the ones when the books came out because as I say regularly, I'm a reader. There's nothing more relaxing and wonderful than having a big book to read that you can't wait to sink your teeth into and pass hours and hours of being lost in a world of fiction.

Today is still a good Harry Potter day though. I actually count the books and movies as seperate entities. Even though the movie was based on the book, they're different. I picture Harry, Hermione and Ron more as the illustrations from the books than the actors who play them. I collect some Harry Potter stuff and most of it features the illustrations. That's not to say I don't think that Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint and Emma Watson don't do a fine job of playing Harry, Ron and Hermione but they're not the characters I read about in the book.

It doesn't mean that I'm not excited about the movie.

However, I do wish I could reread the entire series anew. If I did nowadays, I'd be reading each one for the multipleth time. They were wonderful reads, the kind of books that become old friends. The best thing of all is that they're a series and once you start, you have what seems to be an endless supply of future reading.

Of course, once you get to the last book in the series, it's a little like Christmas Eve; you WANT to read it just like you want Christmas to come but you know once it does, it's going to pass so quickly you're going to wish it was still Christmas Eve.

That's where I am with the Charlaine Harris novels. I started the last one in the series last night. I know that there'll be more later on but I had this fantastically entertaining pile of books to read and somehow, not slowly enough, I ended up on the last one somehow. I'm rather sad about it because I have no idea what to read next. I have books to read but I've been so immersed in the world of Sookie Stackhouse that coming out of it might be a problem. I'm going to wonder why everyone is coming out in the daytime and how, when it's a full moon, there aren't any were-creatures around.

Yes. I know. I should move onto other books. I'm sure I have some other, more literary, books to read. However, I like reading non-literary books. I applaud Charlaine Harris for creating a series that may not be the most literary thing ever but they are ridiculous entertaining and that's the mark of a good writer. I find escapism into her worlds similar to that of J.K. Rowling's. This is not to compare the two writers because they're wildly different in style, character building, narrative and everything. Yet in both Harris' and Rowling's worlds, the blending of our world with that of the the magical/supernatural is almost...believable. With the world of Harry Potter, it is easy enough to believe that underneath the bland, easy world of reality there's a whole, hidden world full of magic. It's concealed from the muggles in very creative ways, ways that are believable from the minute you step inside the pages of Harry Potter.

With the world of Sookie Stackhouse, once you open the first book, it is actually quite easy to see how vampires are able to be 'out' in the world, how the werewolves and were-creatures, witches, demons and other 'supes' are waiting in the shadows, watching to see how the world reacts to the Great Revelation of the vampires. Soon enough, these creatures will come out of the shadows and the humans in Sookie's world will see that vampires are the tip of the iceberg.

I love that in the Sookie books, there is no apology, no overexplaining of how these creatures can exist, why they exist. They're just there, given personalities and traits that make them oddly appealing and endlessly fascinating.

I'm going to be sad to finish inhabiting Sookie's world when I close that last book. I think I'm going to have to read another series. Suggestions would be much appreciated. I've heard Anita Blake is good but I'm not sure I want another vampire series yet, however.

Still, for now, at least I have Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince to watch. It's not quite the same as getting lost in a book but it will do. For now.

Happy Wednesday.

Sookie Stackhouse: Now Those are REAL Vampires...

This week is going fast. I rarely say that but, for once, it's true. Maybe it's because I bought a house, maybe it's because it's busy at work suddenly but...whatever it is, it's already Wednesday and the week is almost half over.

Sometimes it seems like the week is going too fast, like I get home from work, work out, make dinner and it's almost time for bed. Of course, that may be because I'm having fun reading at the moment and I love to go to bed early and read until I'm ready for sleep. I think I mentioned that I'm working my way through the Sookie Stackhouse Southern Vampire series at the moment. I'm on book five already. They're so easy and fun to read, I'm having to pace myself. I feel like, suddenly, it's ok to like vampires again.

I've always liked vampires. I used to read this series when I was young called "The Little Vampire" by Angela Somer-Bodenburg. They were about a vampire child named Rudolph who was too young to drink human blood but was from a family of ancient vampires. He introduces his family to Tony, his new human friend and, naturally, adventures ensue. After that series came Dracula, naturally and then Anne Rice. I loved the first four books in the Vampire Chronicles. I read the ones that she wrote after those and with each one, the mysterious, romantic and erotic world she created began to suddenly be beyond ridiculous. Lestat lost his sexy bad-boy appeal and became almost as whiny as Louis, the narrator of Interview with a Vampire.

Then I stopped reading vampire books for a while. There was plenty of other fiction out there. Sure, I read Salem's Lot, Stephen King's rather creepy foray in the vampire genre. I played vampire video games with my brother, Dracula Unleashed being our favourite. Yet I stopped searching for vampire fiction.

Then, of course, came Twilight and it's subsequently and increasingly awful sequels. While I've blogged about the fact that, if I'd been a sixteen year old girl, I'd have probably liked the novels more, I'm not a sixteen year-old and thus I think the novels are pretty awful. I've blogged about the books already and why I think they're awful so I won't go into that again. Yet, I can safely say, now I'm reading Charlaine Harris' Sookie Stackhouse series, I can point my finger at Stephanie Meyer and say, "Lady, did you think of ANYTHING original?"

Sookie's been around a fair bit longer than Bella, the whinier, more helpless heroine of the Twilight series. She's a telepath whereas in Twilight, Edward Cullen is the telepath. Sookie doesn't have many friends because people are freaked out by her mind-reading ability. Bella doesn't have many friends because she's annoying and whiny and falls in love with a vampire because there's not much else to do in rainy Forks. Sookie's boss and sometimes-crush is her boss, Sam who happens to be a shapeshifter and proves himself a loyal friend to Sookie. Bella's friend, Jacob, is a loyal friend to Bella and also happens to be a werewolf. That is, to say, in the first three books, he's a werewolf. In Breaking Dawn, Stephanie Meyer decides he and his co-werewolves are now shapeshifters because, well, why not arbitrarily change a character at the last minute?

I could continue on. There are more than a few more similarities between the books. In the very first book of the Sookie series, Dead Until Dark, Sookie describes how the vampires skin seems to glow, how the vampires are all beautiful. It turns out that it makes it much easier to get human prey that way. Interestingly enough, in Twilight, the vampires are described as having glowy skin and are stunningly beautiful because, you know, it makes it easier to get prey that way. I'll give Meijer kudos for getting around that pesky traditional " the sun kills vampires" lore; in her books, the sun makes the vampires sparkle "like they've been dusted with diamonds" and that's why they have to stay out of it because otherwise humans would realize they were vampires.

I know that, really, much of Charlaine Harris' vampire/supernatural creature lore is not original. Vampires are cold because..they're dead. Werewolves run hotter than humans because...they're part wolf and plenty more. Yet Harris presents it in such a fun, matter-of-fact way that you can almost believe there are vampires, shapeshifters, werewolves and fairies hiding in the moss-dripping trees of the Louisiana Bayou.

The other thing about her books is that...they're sexy. I'm not faulting Stephanie Meyer for the fact that her books are rated PG that even the pillow-tearing, headboard-breaking 'sex scene' has all the sensuality of a Victorian teaparty. It's nice that she can give our over-sexed teenagers something to obsess over that isn't about sex but is about love.

Yet, I'm not a teenager and I quite like reading a good sex-scene and, let me tell you, Charlaine Harris is the queen of the good sex-scenes. I never much cared for Bill, Sookie's vampire boyfriend, because I thought him a wee bit drippy yet in bed, I quite liked Bill. Of course, then there's Eric. I had to turn the air conditioning on when I got to book four because, let me tell you, it might not be literature but it is fun. And really, really...uh....hot.

I realize my mother reads my blog. Fortunately, my mother doesn't seem to get shocked when I bring up sex as I do every so often. So I don't think she's going to say, "Captain Monkeypants, I raised you better than that!" Also, she and my dad watch True Blood, the HBO adaptation of the novels so she knows what they're about. I'm going to loan them to her, in fact.

So, anyway, I guess the purpose of today's blog is to recommend the Sookie books if you're into fun reads. I have to give credit to two friends (and loyal blog readers) who recommended I read them. You know who you are...and I thank you both, Mrs. Future Texan and Mrs. Likes-Twilight-a-Little-Too-Much-But-You're-Completely-Forgiven-For-Sending-Me-Your-Sookie-Stackhouse-Books.

Granted, the books aren't at the level of, say, Jane Austen but even she has been adapted to fit the modern world with Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. Is it too hard to imagine Mansfield Park Full of Vampires or Sense and Sensibility And Fangs? I, personally, don't think so. Also, I think that would be intriguing. Probably horribly wrong...but intriguing.

Happy Wednesday.

The Vampire Trend

It is a nasty, damp, steamy day out there. We had thunderstorms last night, not the air-clearing kind but the clinging kind that come in, rumble, rain and then evaporate, leaving the air heavier and stickier than ever.

It's grey and gloomy and feels like a 'stay in bed' type of morning. Unfortunately, I have work commitments and I had to rouse myself. I also had to rouse Sausage who does NOT like to get out of bed until he's ready. He growls gently at me when I make him get up. It makes me laugh. I don't think he means to be funny.

Things are going a little better with the dog. I think he only barks a little in the crate and settles down to sleep after he realizes he's in there for a while. At least, this is what I've convinced myself. There's less guilt involved in that. Doggie day care didn't work out. For one thing, they never called me back and, for another, I realized they'd need proof that Sausage had his vaccinations as a puppy and, naturally, I don't have that proof.

So, it's just me and Sausage for a few more days. We have a routine now, at least I think we do. I get home from work and we walk. He hates walking because he's a lazy dachshund. Once he's done his business, he doesn't see the point of walking anymore. I think exercise is good for him. In disagreement, there will be times during our walks in which he will sit himself down on the grass and refuse to move. Then, when I make him get up, he gives me disgusted looks and trots along until he decides to sit down again. Like I said, we have a routine.

Of course, having a routine with Sausage means my regular routine is a little off-kilter. I haven't been able to write in a while because of house-buying, Washington D.C.-visiting, Sausage-sitting and various other interruptions. Of course, I do recognize the fact that I could still find time to write but...I'm not. I hate that I'm not. I hate that the past few years have spurned a flurry of books from me and this past year has been very thin on the writing front. I love to write. I want to write. It's just been a bad year as far as getting anywhere with my writing. I can blame the economy a little for that. I can also blame my writing for that. I'm writing what I want, not what's popular.

At the moment, I should be writing vampire novels, it seems. That's the trend. People give credit to Twilight and Stephanie Meyer's other vampire books. I don't. Vampires weren't invented by Meyer, they were just Victorian-ized, stripped of their natural eroticism and made sparkley. I'm reading Charlaine Harris' Sookie Stackhouse books at the moment and enjoying them immensely. Now these books are what vampire books should be: Sexy, funny, witty and clever. While I know the actual writing in them isn't perfect, the beauty of Harris' books is that I don't care. I'm so taken in by the story and the characters that I forget to notice the writing. To me, that's the mark of a good writer, not necessarily the structure, the words, the grammar and the formal side of the craft.

What I love about Charlaine Harris' books is that she has fun writing them. You can jump right into the story and when you're reading them, it seems perfectly natural that vampires have come out of the coffin and are fighting for equal rights in society, that shapeshifters are lurking in the shadows, trying to hide what they really are by keeping a human form, that mythical creatures lurk in the woods. I enjoy reading about Sookie because she acts like a real human; yes, she makes some unwise choices because she's a little naive but...I find it perfectly believable that she would fall in love with a vampire. I also rather like that though she loves the Vampire Bill, she's still horribly disgusted with the more bloodthirsty vamps and the fact that they're actually...you know...dead. She's also declared that she adores sunshine and has no intention of becoming a vampire. I love her for this. Unlike, say, Bella Swann from the Twilight novels who fell for a vampire, is enamored with their beauty and was already begging to be turned into a vamp at the end of the first novel. Sookie also can take care of herself or, at least, thinks she can and tries admirably. She doesn't always needs to be rescued. I like that in a heroine.

Anyway, these are only two of the vampire series flooding the market. In the teen market, in particular, there are multiple other series or stand-alone books on the Barnes and Noble display tables. Next season on TV, a series called The Vampire Diaries is being filmed for the CW network. Now there's talk about a remake of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie. If you've seen the first movie, you'll know it was awful. It was bad. It was campy crap that only has significance because it was the springboard for the brilliant TV series by Joss Whedon.

Of course, Joss isn't going to be involved in the movie. From what I'm reading, he wasn't asked and the studio responsible for the stupid idea is hoping to jump on the vampire band wagon. Also, knowing what I know about Joss, he probably said, "what a dumb idea," shrugged, and continued filming Cabin in the Woods or whatever is the name of his new movie. You see, Joss probably knows what all we Buffy fans know. Buffy was only Buffy because of Joss. Take the Whedon out the equation and essentially what you have is...the original Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie with Donald Sutherland, Luke Perry and Kristy Swanson which...sucked. Joss wrote the script for that movie and was essentially taken out of the equation because the studio so heavily rewrote his script. When the movie bombed, Joss took his idea and made the series which, to me, is still some of the best television ever created.

I know I won't be going to see that movie. What's the point? I've lived in Buffy's world and it's in Sunnydale, California which, blew up at the end of the series. Buffy and the slayers are all around the world these days. That's the Buffy I know. It'd be a little like going to see a remake of Star Wars in which Luke Skywalker was allowed to exist but there could be no Han Solo, Princess Leia or Darth Vadar because the studio didn't have the rights to the characters. Dumb, right?

I could rant all day about this but it won't do any good. Movie studios are greedy. They've long forgotten to make movies for the filmgoers, concentrating instead of the cheapest way to make a lot of money. Fortunately, there are talents like Joss Whedon out there to give us what we really need: Good entertainment that actually makes us think a little at the same time we're laughing.

I've digressed from my original point which is why I stopped writing for a while. I want to wait and see when the wheel of trends turns, what will be next. We've had pirates, wizards and dragons recently...I'm curious to see what's next to be in vogue. Then again, if I get my act together, maybe I can try creating something original that sparks a million other ideas.

You just never know.

Happy Wednesday